{"id":10604,"date":"2025-08-25T08:33:05","date_gmt":"2025-08-25T12:33:05","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.cartoonstock.com\/blog\/?p=10604"},"modified":"2026-01-07T08:07:21","modified_gmt":"2026-01-07T13:07:21","slug":"pirates-caption-contest-commentary-with-lawrence-wood","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.cartoonstock.com\/blog\/pirates-caption-contest-commentary-with-lawrence-wood\/","title":{"rendered":"&#8220;Pirates&#8221; Caption Contest Commentary with Lawrence Wood"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter wp-image-10607 size-full\" src=\"https:\/\/www.cartoonstock.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/08\/MeredithSouthardPirateCaptionContestColorSMALLER.jpg\" alt=\"CartoonStock caption contest cartoon by Meredith Southard. Pirate captain is discussing a nearby pirate with a hook for a hand\" width=\"625\" height=\"576\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.cartoonstock.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/08\/MeredithSouthardPirateCaptionContestColorSMALLER.jpg 625w, https:\/\/www.cartoonstock.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/08\/MeredithSouthardPirateCaptionContestColorSMALLER-300x276.jpg 300w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 625px) 100vw, 625px\" \/><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Last month\u2019s contest featured a drawing by <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">New Yorker<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> cartoonist<a href=\"https:\/\/www.cartoonstock.com\/cartoonists\/meredithsouthard\"> Meredith Southard<\/a>. It\u2019s set on a pirate ship where the captain, who\u2019s wearing an eye patch and has a hook for a left hand, is saying something to the pirate who\u2019s standing to his right. The captain\u2019s speaking out of the side of his mouth, as if he\u2019s saying something under his breath. He\u2019s also looking at and gesturing toward two other pirates, both of whom have lost at least one hand and an eye. One of them has also lost the bottom half of his right leg. The other appears to be waving his hook at the captain. (Bob Mankoff thought this aspect of the cartoon had to be addressed but, as you\u2019ll see, the rest of the judges and Meredith Southard disagreed.) The pirate to whom the captain is speaking has both his eyes and all his limbs.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">I know some people found this drawing confusing because both the captain and the pirate who\u2019s waving his hook have their mouths open, but I don\u2019t think it\u2019s confusing at all. The captain is clearly speaking because he\u2019s the focus of the drawing. Your eye is drawn immediately to him, and the other pirates (including the one whose mouth is slightly open) are there to provide clues as to what the captain could be saying.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Meredith Southard was unable to join the judging panel for this contest, but she did send us her original caption: <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">\u201cArr, there be no OSHA regulations aboard this ship.\u201d<\/span><\/i><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">One of you made a similar joke and gave it a nice ironic spin: <\/span><b><i>\u201cAnd that\u2019s our safety team.\u201d<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">These entries all suggest that the new guy will lose a limb or an eye soon enough:<\/span><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li aria-level=\"1\"><b><i>\u201cI\u2019ll teach you everything I taught them.\u201d<\/i><\/b><\/li>\n<li aria-level=\"1\"><b><i>\u201cYou won\u2019t be overqualified for long.\u201d<\/i><\/b><\/li>\n<li aria-level=\"1\"><b><i>\u201cAnd this is our mentorship team.\u201d<\/i><\/b><\/li>\n<li aria-level=\"1\"><b><i>\u201cThere\u2019s a bit of a learning curve.\u201d<\/i><\/b><\/li>\n<li aria-level=\"1\"><b><i>\u201cBe ye a registered organ donor?\u201d<\/i><\/b><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">As mentioned above, Bob thought the captions had to address the fact that one of the pirates seems to be waving his hook. I disagree, but here are the best of those captions:<\/span><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li aria-level=\"1\"><b><i>\u201cThey sell those bobble-hooks in every port now.\u201d<\/i><\/b><\/li>\n<li aria-level=\"1\"><b><i>\u201cAs mutinies go, this is pretty tame.\u201d<\/i><\/b><\/li>\n<li aria-level=\"1\"><b><i>\u201cDid he just give me the finger?\u201d<\/i><\/b><\/li>\n<li aria-level=\"1\"><b><i>\u201cCompliment his ASL.\u201d<\/i><\/b><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Bob loved the bobble-hook joke, but I did not. More on that later.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Though I usually get blamed for promoting tasteless sex jokes, I am not the one who included this caption among his top ten entries: <\/span><b><i>\u201cUnfortunately, that\u2019s the hand he uses to masturbate.\u201d<\/i><\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> It did make me laugh, though.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Here\u2019s the month\u2019s best joke about a Triple-A baseball team: <\/span><b><i>\u201cAnd that\u2019s Charlie. Charlie from Poughkeepsie.\u201d<\/i><\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> The term \u201cPoughkeepsie Pirates\u201d has several definitions, so that caption might actually be the best joke about a canoeing club on the Hudson River, thieves who steal packages from porches, or people who violate FCC rules by allowing their properties to be used for illegal broadcasts. But I think it\u2019s about the baseball team.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">I love the way the following caption suggests that the new pirate is on the right track but has a ways to go before he really looks the part: <\/span><b><i>\u201cYour bandana is a good start.\u201d<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The next four entries all highlight the new pirate\u2019s ability to do certain things much better than his shipmates:<\/span><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li aria-level=\"1\"><b><i>\u201cI think you\u2019re the only one who can hold your liquor.\u201d<\/i><\/b><\/li>\n<li aria-level=\"1\"><b><i>\u201cGuess which one of you is giving me a backrub.\u201d<\/i><\/b><\/li>\n<li aria-level=\"1\"><b><i>\u201cYour job is mainly going to be tying knots.\u201d<\/i><\/b><\/li>\n<li aria-level=\"1\"><b><i>\u201cWe have so many jars for you to open.\u201d<\/i><\/b><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">On the other hand, hooks can on occasion provide an advantage:<\/span><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li aria-level=\"1\"><b><i>\u201cJoin us in the galley \u2013 it\u2019s fondue.\u201d<\/i><\/b><\/li>\n<li aria-level=\"1\"><b><i>\u201cAnd in the evenings, we crochet.\u201d<\/i><\/b><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Most of the time, however, they\u2019re a distinct disadvantage:<\/span><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li aria-level=\"1\"><b><i>\u201cIt happens a lot. They forget about the hook and stab themselves in the eye.\u201d<\/i><\/b><\/li>\n<li aria-level=\"1\"><b><i>\u201cWaving is ok, but no making hearts or blowing kisses.\u201d<\/i><\/b><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">I love the way both those captions make you picture the slapstick ways the pirates injure themselves.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Here are the month\u2019s best puns:<\/span><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li aria-level=\"1\"><b><i>\u201cDon\u2019t make the same mistake we did when they yell \u2018all hands on deck!\u2019\u201d<\/i><\/b><\/li>\n<li aria-level=\"1\"><b><i>\u201cSorry, no severance pay.\u201d<\/i><\/b><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">There were a lot of jokes about medical coverage. None was great, but these two were OK:<\/span><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li aria-level=\"1\"><b><i>\u201cI think it\u2019s pretty evident why our insurance rates are going up.\u201d<\/i><\/b><\/li>\n<li aria-level=\"1\"><b><i>\u201cTurns out the real treasure was group health insurance.\u201d<\/i><\/b><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">That second joke reminds me of this classic by Dave Borchart:<\/span><\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.cartoonstock.com\/cartoon?searchID=AM600002\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter wp-image-10610\" src=\"https:\/\/www.cartoonstock.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/08\/AM600002_Sharing-300x240.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"600\" height=\"480\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.cartoonstock.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/08\/AM600002_Sharing-300x240.jpg 300w, https:\/\/www.cartoonstock.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/08\/AM600002_Sharing-768x614.jpg 768w, https:\/\/www.cartoonstock.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/08\/AM600002_Sharing.jpg 800w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 600px) 100vw, 600px\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Up next we have two variations on the same joke, which I really like because it\u2019s consistent with each character\u2019s expression:<\/span><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li aria-level=\"1\"><b><i>\u201cPretend we\u2019re talking. I can\u2019t do another chat about you-know-what.\u201d<\/i><\/b><\/li>\n<li aria-level=\"1\"><b><i>\u201cArgh, I cannot make any more small talk about prosthetics.\u201d<\/i><\/b><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">I initially liked this caption\u2014<\/span><b><i>\u201cWe\u2019re looking for someone with more experience.\u201d<\/i><\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">\u2014which suggests that the captain is telling the new guy why he\u2019s not right for the job, but it doesn\u2019t match the captain\u2019s expression. Nor does it make sense because the new guy\u2019s already working on the ship.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Bob and Joel Mishon had an unusually long argument about this caption: <\/span><b><i>\u201cI\u2019m looking for a new right hand man.\u201d <\/i><\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Joel said it doesn\u2019t make sense because there\u2019s nothing wrong with the captain\u2019s <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">right<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> hand, but Bob insisted that Joel must not understand the term \u201cright-hand man.\u201d<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Bob and Joel, however, did both like this entry: <\/span><b><i>\u201cI want you to be my eyes and ears, and hands.\u201d<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Congratulations to JOLENE CHONGCHUA, who submitted this month\u2019s winning caption: <\/span><b><i>\u201cYour bandana is a good start.\u201d<\/i><\/b><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> Jolene is married to Victor Chongchua, who won the <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">New Yorker<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> caption contest featuring this drawing by Ed Himelblau:<\/span><\/p>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"aligncenter wp-image-10612\" src=\"https:\/\/www.cartoonstock.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/08\/Screenshot-2025-08-25-at-8.31.29\u202fAM-300x280.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"500\" height=\"467\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.cartoonstock.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/08\/Screenshot-2025-08-25-at-8.31.29\u202fAM-300x280.jpg 300w, https:\/\/www.cartoonstock.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/08\/Screenshot-2025-08-25-at-8.31.29\u202fAM-1024x957.jpg 1024w, https:\/\/www.cartoonstock.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/08\/Screenshot-2025-08-25-at-8.31.29\u202fAM-768x718.jpg 768w, https:\/\/www.cartoonstock.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2025\/08\/Screenshot-2025-08-25-at-8.31.29\u202fAM.jpg 1524w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 500px) 100vw, 500px\" \/><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Victor also created WordsBelow.app, a subscription service that includes data from every <\/span><i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">New Yorker<\/span><\/i><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\"> caption contest and enables you to search for any entry and find those that were selected as finalists and winners.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">The five runners-up for this contest are:<\/span><\/p>\n<ul>\n<li aria-level=\"1\"><b><i>\u201cWaving is ok, but no making hearts or blowing kisses.\u201d<\/i><\/b><\/li>\n<li aria-level=\"1\"><b><i>\u201cGuess which one of you is giving me a backrub.\u201d<\/i><\/b><\/li>\n<li aria-level=\"1\"><b><i>\u201cThey sell those bobble-hooks in every port now.\u201d<\/i><\/b><\/li>\n<li aria-level=\"1\"><b><i>\u201cYour job is mainly going to be tying knots.\u201d<\/i><\/b><\/li>\n<li aria-level=\"1\"><b><i>\u201cYou won\u2019t be overqualified for long.\u201d<\/i><\/b><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400;\">Whoever submitted the bobble-hook joke should split their winnings with Bob because he is the only reason that entry was selected as a finalist. I would have knocked it out and replaced it with, <\/span><b><i>\u201cPretend we\u2019re talking. I can\u2019t do another chat about you-know-what.\u201d<\/i><\/b><\/p>\n<h3>Watch the Judging Process<\/h3>\n<p>If you want to see how we made our selections, we recorded the process and posted it below<\/p>\n<div style=\"position: relative; padding-bottom: 56.25%; height: 0; overflow: hidden; max-width: 100%; margin: 20px 0;\"><iframe style=\"position: absolute; top: 0; left: 0; width: 100%; height: 100%;\" src=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/embed\/2RQ5LQQ86nk\" frameborder=\"0\" allowfullscreen=\"allowfullscreen\"><\/iframe><\/div>\n<p style=\"color: #666666; font-size: 14px; font-style: italic; margin-top: 12px;\">Like what you see? <a style=\"color: #ff6b35; font-weight: 600;\" href=\"https:\/\/www.youtube.com\/@cartoonstockacartooncollec9238\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener\">Subscribe to our YouTube channel<\/a> for more Caption Contest episodes.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Last month\u2019s contest featured a drawing by New Yorker cartoonist Meredith Southard. It\u2019s set on a pirate ship where the captain, who\u2019s wearing an eye patch and has a hook for a left hand, is saying something to the pirate who\u2019s standing to his right. The captain\u2019s speaking out of the side of his mouth,&#8230; <br \/><a class=\"more-link button\" style=\"float:right;margin:10px\" href=\"https:\/\/www.cartoonstock.com\/blog\/pirates-caption-contest-commentary-with-lawrence-wood\/\" rel=\"nofollow\">Continue Reading&#8230;<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":11,"featured_media":10608,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_genesis_hide_title":false,"_genesis_hide_breadcrumbs":false,"_genesis_hide_singular_image":false,"_genesis_hide_footer_widgets":false,"_genesis_custom_body_class":"","_genesis_custom_post_class":"","_genesis_layout":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[39],"tags":[],"class_list":{"0":"post-10604","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"has-post-thumbnail","7":"category-caption-contest-commentary","8":"entry"},"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.5 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>&quot;Pirates&quot; 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