{"id":2251,"date":"2019-06-05T06:00:01","date_gmt":"2019-06-05T10:00:01","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/more.cartooncollections.com\/?p=2251"},"modified":"2020-08-19T09:43:21","modified_gmt":"2020-08-19T13:43:21","slug":"mummy-man-caption-contest-commentary-with-lawrence-wood","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.cartoonstock.com\/blog\/mummy-man-caption-contest-commentary-with-lawrence-wood\/","title":{"rendered":"\u201cMummy Man\u201d Caption Contest Commentary with Lawrence Wood"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignright wp-image-2214\" src=\"\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/05\/Doctors-WIthout-Diplomas-31.jpg\" alt=\"Cartoon Caption Contest -Eckstein\" width=\"300\" height=\"208\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.cartoonstock.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/05\/Doctors-WIthout-Diplomas-31.jpg 800w, https:\/\/www.cartoonstock.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/05\/Doctors-WIthout-Diplomas-31-300x208.jpg 300w, https:\/\/www.cartoonstock.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/05\/Doctors-WIthout-Diplomas-31-768x532.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 300px) 100vw, 300px\" \/>In Bob Eckstein\u2019s cartoon, a doctor who\u2019s bandaging a patient from head to toe is pushing his foot against the patient\u2019s back for leverage, and delivering the line that will serve as the caption.<\/p>\n<p>Focusing on the tape, I first made an insurance joke: <b>\u201cIf you had Medicaid, I\u2019d have to use red tape.\u201d<\/b><\/p>\n<p>I then came up with two captions that presume the doctor is trying to deal with an infectious disease:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><strong>\u201cIn case it\u2019s contagious.\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>\u201cIn the old days, you\u2019d have been quarantined.\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>Next, I imagined the doctor overreacting to the patient\u2019s medical issue: <b>\u201cThat should keep your finger immobilized.\u201d<\/b><\/p>\n<p>Then I imagined the doctor responding defensively to the patient\u2019s complaint about the doctor\u2019s approach: <b>\u201cDo I tell you how to do your job?\u201d<\/b><\/p>\n<p>Finally, I went with a couple mummy jokes:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><strong>\u201cI practice Egyptian medicine.\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>\u201cI did my residency is Cairo.\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>Now let\u2019s see how you did:<\/p>\n<p>There were a lot of insurance jokes, and the best included:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><strong>\u201cYes, you have complete coverage.\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>\u201cDon&#8217;t worry, it&#8217;s fully covered.\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>\u201cWhat did you think full coverage meant?\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>\u201cDon&#8217;t move until I meet your deductible.\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>\u201cUnfortunately, your HMO covers red tape only.\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>I\u2019m partial to that last entry because, like one of my captions, it makes a reference to red tape, but it should end with that reference. \u201cRed tape\u201d is the punchline, so the word \u201conly\u201d should be removed from the end of the caption and appear immediately before the word \u201ccovers.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>There were also a lot of mummy jokes:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><strong>\u201cIt may be uncomfortable now, but you&#8217;ll thank me in 3,000 years.\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>\u201cNow remember &#8211; walk like an Egyptian.\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>\u201cYou should cut back on the preservatives.\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>\u201cWhy, yes, I did study medicine in Egypt. Why do you ask?\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>That last entry, which is substantively similar to my \u201cresidency is Cairo\u201d caption, highlights some common mistakes. First, it\u2019s too long. Second, it ends (as many entries do) with the question, \u201cWhy do you ask?\u201d I don\u2019t think that question, which I see all the time, has ever improved a caption. It just makes the caption longer for no good purpose aside from hammering home the point that you\u2019re making a joke. Don\u2019t do it.<\/p>\n<p>Here\u2019s a great caption for the #MeToo era, or what\u2019s sometimes solemnly referred to as the current climate: <b>\u201cTry groping the nurses now.\u201d<\/b><\/p>\n<p>I love all of the following captions, which go after the same good joke:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><strong>\u201cYou\u2019ll need to change this twice a day.\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>\u201cRemember to change it every four hours.\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>\u201cRemember to change the bandage daily.\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>Here is a similar, and equally great, caption: <b>\u201cDon&#8217;t get it wet in the shower.\u201d<\/b><\/p>\n<p>There were many personal injury\/unethical lawyer jokes, and these were the two best:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><strong>\u201cDon&#8217;t worry, your attorney will remove these right after court tomorrow.\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>\u201cThe jury will love this.\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>I really like these two variations on the same terrific idea:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><strong>\u201cWill someone be driving you home?\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>\u201cDo you have a ride home?\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>As I did, many of you imagined the doctor overreacting to the patient\u2019s medical issue, and I especially liked these two captions (both of which are better than my similar entry):<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><strong>\u201cThis should stop the bleeding.\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>\u201cYou can&#8217;t be too careful about a sprained ankle.\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>I also really liked these unclassifiable entries:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><strong>\u201cWait a minute. Where&#8217;s my watch?\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>\u201cYour doctor called in sick-I work in shipping.\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>\u201cNurse, do you remember who this is?\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>\u201cYou won&#8217;t be able to drive but you should be able to hail a cab.\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>This week there were so many good entries I want to select not just a winning caption <b>(\u201cDo you have a ride home?\u201d<\/b>), but two runners-up:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><strong>\u201cThe jury will love this.\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>\u201cDon\u2019t get it wet in the shower.\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>In Bob Eckstein\u2019s cartoon, a doctor who\u2019s bandaging a patient from head to toe is pushing his foot against the patient\u2019s back for leverage, and delivering the line that will serve as the caption. Focusing on the tape, I first made an insurance joke: \u201cIf you had Medicaid, I\u2019d have to use red tape.\u201d I&#8230; <br \/><a class=\"more-link button\" style=\"float:right;margin:10px\" href=\"https:\/\/www.cartoonstock.com\/blog\/mummy-man-caption-contest-commentary-with-lawrence-wood\/\" rel=\"nofollow\">Continue Reading&#8230;<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":11,"featured_media":2252,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_genesis_hide_title":false,"_genesis_hide_breadcrumbs":false,"_genesis_hide_singular_image":false,"_genesis_hide_footer_widgets":false,"_genesis_custom_body_class":"","_genesis_custom_post_class":"","_genesis_layout":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[39],"tags":[],"class_list":{"0":"post-2251","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"has-post-thumbnail","7":"category-caption-contest-commentary","8":"entry"},"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.5 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>\u201cMummy Man\u201d Caption Contest Commentary with Lawrence Wood &#8211; The CartoonStock.com Blog<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"\u201cMummy Man\u201d Caption Contest Commentary 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