{"id":4490,"date":"2020-08-25T09:47:07","date_gmt":"2020-08-25T13:47:07","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/more.cartooncollections.com\/?p=4490"},"modified":"2020-08-25T10:29:59","modified_gmt":"2020-08-25T14:29:59","slug":"campsite-comic-caption-contest-commentary-with-lawrence-wood","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.cartoonstock.com\/blog\/campsite-comic-caption-contest-commentary-with-lawrence-wood\/","title":{"rendered":"&#8220;Campsite Comic&#8221; Caption Contest Commentary with Lawrence Wood"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignright wp-image-4434\" src=\"\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/08\/BearStandUp-CC.jpg\" alt=\"Caption Contest\" width=\"350\" height=\"263\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.cartoonstock.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/08\/BearStandUp-CC.jpg 800w, https:\/\/www.cartoonstock.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/08\/BearStandUp-CC-300x226.jpg 300w, https:\/\/www.cartoonstock.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2020\/08\/BearStandUp-CC-768x578.jpg 768w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 350px) 100vw, 350px\" \/>The campers in Benjamin Schwartz\u2019s cartoon are in their sleeping bags. They\u2019ve been awakened by a bear, who\u2019s performing a stand-up routine just outside their tent. The male camper is reaching into his backpack for his cellphone, and his girlfriend is saying something to him.<\/p>\n<p>I first made references to killing and dying, words that mean one thing in the context of bear attacks and something very different in the world of stand-up comedy.<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><strong>\u201cLet\u2019s hope he dies out there so he can\u2019t kill in here.\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>\u201cOh, God. He\u2019s killing out there.\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>\u201cIt\u2019s OK. He\u2019s dying out there.\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>I then focused on the cellphone. Stand-up comics are starting to ban such devices to prevent audience members from recording and posting routines that are still being fine-tuned.<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><strong>\u201cDon\u2019t record him when he\u2019s workshopping new material.\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>\u201cDon\u2019t\u2026Chris Rock says cellphones are killing comedy.\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>Some comics rely on scatological humor, and I thought a bear might, as well.<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><strong>\u201cAre all his jokes are about shitting in the woods?\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>\u201cHis humor\u2019s so scatological.\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>\u201cHe puts the scat in scatological.\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>Stand-up comics hate hecklers, and they delight in destroying them from the stage, as Patton Oswalt did to one reckless audience member who foolishly interrupted Patton\u2019s story about the morning after pill. (You can listen to Patton absolutely grind this heckler into dust on the wonderful CD, \u201cWerewolves and Lollipops.\u201d) My memory of their exchange\u2014which I\u2019ll never forget\u2014led to this caption: <strong>\u201cNo heckling.\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>I\u2019m a 58-year-old Jew, so I grew up listening to comedy albums by Mel Brooks and Carl Reiner, Richard Klein, Woody Allen, and Lenny Bruce, all of whom honed their stand-up skills while performing in what was known as the Borscht Belt\u2014summer resorts in the Catskill Mountains, and popular vacation destinations for New York City Jews. (\u201cDirty Dancing\u201d and several episodes of \u201cThe Marvelous Mrs. Maisel\u201d were set there.) Because the Catskills have the highest density of black bears in New York State, I came up with this caption: <strong>\u201cI forgot there were bears in the Borscht Belt.\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Now let\u2019s see how you did:<\/p>\n<p>There were a lot of references to killing and dying. These were the best:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><strong>\u201cI hope he doesn\u2019t kill tonight.\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>\u201cAt least he\u2019s not killing.\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>\u201cWho knew bears could kill in a good way?\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>\u201cWe\u2019re safe. He\u2019s dying out there.\u201d<\/strong><strong><br \/>\n<\/strong><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>There were even more references to the dangers of heckling:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><strong>\u201cThe field guide discourages heckling.\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>\u201cDo not heckle him.\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>\u201cDon\u2019t heckle him.\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>\u201cStop heckling him!\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>\u201cWould you stop heckling him?\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>\u201cDo. Not. Heckle.\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>One of you, however, suggested heckling as a survival tactic: <strong>\u201cI think you\u2019re supposed to make yourself look big, bang pots together, and heckle.\u201d<\/strong><strong>\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Speaking of heckling, one of you submitted this insult: <strong>\u201cI should have known camping in Larry Woods would expose us to unfunny one-liners.\u201d<\/strong> If I were Patton Oswalt I\u2019d respond with a devastating put-down, but I\u2019m not that mean. Also, I can\u2019t think of anything.<strong>\u00a0<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>I like this twist on one of the most tired conventions in stand-up comedy: <strong>\u201cIf he says he\u2019s hungry, do <em>not<\/em> ask how hungry.\u201d<\/strong> I would, however, have italicized the word \u201chow\u201d instead of \u201cnot.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>Here\u2019s an allusion to the line that second-rate comics use when their jokes get no response: <strong>\u201cHe knows we\u2019re in here. He can hear us breathing.\u201d<\/strong> And here\u2019s a clever reference to one of the most overworked subjects in stand-up comedy: <strong>\u201cHow would he know anything about airline food?\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Does a bear shit in the woods? That line, used to sarcastically imply that the answer to whatever question has just been posed is obviously \u201cyes,\u201d inspired these entries:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><strong>\u201cApparently bears do shtick in the woods.\u201d <\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>\u201cWho\u2019d have thought they do <em>this <\/em>in the woods?\u201d <\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>\u201cA bear isn\u2019t the only thing that shits in the woods.\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>\u201cBears aren\u2019t the only ones that shit in the woods.\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>I like the way those last two (nearly identical) captions address not just the clich\u00e9 about shitting in the woods, but the terror of encountering a bear in the wild.<\/p>\n<p>I love this reference to testing a microphone: <strong>\u201cI wonder if we\u2019re the one two, one two.\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>This common statement takes on an entirely new and fitting meaning in the context of Schwartz\u2019s drawing<strong>: \u201cI don\u2019t know whether to laugh or cry.\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>There were no good sex jokes this week, so let\u2019s move on to the best puns:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><strong>\u201cMost of his material is garbage.\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>\u201cIt\u2019s open mic season.\u201d<\/strong><strong><br \/>\n<\/strong><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>Here\u2019s a clever twist on a line from Yogi Bear, who considered himself smarter than most of his kind: \u201c<strong>He\u2019s funnier than the average bear.\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Comedians who end their set by saying, \u201cThanks, I\u2019ll be here all week,\u201d inspired this next set of captions:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><strong>\u201cUh oh. Did he just say he\u2019ll be here all week?\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>\u201cWill he be here all week?\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>\u201cAll week?\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>That fist caption would be even better without the words, \u201cUh oh.\u201d<\/p>\n<p>I like the following allusion to Smokey The Bear\u2019s advice about how to stop forest fires&#8211;<strong>\u201cOnly you can prevent another encore\u201d<\/strong>\u2014but substituting the word \u201can\u201d for \u201canother\u201d would cut out two syllables. That might not seem like much, but every syllable counts in a short caption. I also think the campers would have tried to stop even the first encore.<\/p>\n<p>Here\u2019s a terrific reference to the awkward silence that follows a bad joke: <strong>\u201cAll I hear is crickets.\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Two of you alluded to the fact that bears are notorious campsite thieves who take anything that\u2019s left unattended:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><strong>\u201cI told you not to leave the microphone out there.\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>\u201cShe\u2019s stealing my material.\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>And here\u2019s the last caption I\u2019m highlighting this week: <strong>\u201cDon\u2019t worry. I think this is his last set.\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>What a strong showing. Choosing the best caption is not easy\u2014it never is\u2014but I\u2019m going with, <strong>\u201cWe\u2019re safe. He\u2019s dying out there.\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n<p align=\"center\"><a href=\"https:\/\/cartoonstock.com\/blog\/cartoon-caption-contest\/\" class=\"button\">ENTER THIS WEEK&#8217;S CAPTION CONTEST<\/a><\/p>\n<p>  <em>Lawrence Wood has won The New Yorker\u2019s Cartoon Caption Contest a record-setting seven times and been a finalist two other times. He has collaborated with New Yorker cartoonists Peter Kuper, Lila Ash, Felipe Galindo Gomez, and Harry Bliss (until Bliss tossed him aside, as anyone would, to collaborate with Steve Martin). Nine of his collaborations have appeared in The New Yorker, and one is included in the New Yorker Encyclopedia of Cartoons. <\/em><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>The campers in Benjamin Schwartz\u2019s cartoon are in their sleeping bags. They\u2019ve been awakened by a bear, who\u2019s performing a stand-up routine just outside their tent. The male camper is reaching into his backpack for his cellphone, and his girlfriend is saying something to him. I first made references to killing and dying, words that&#8230; <br \/><a class=\"more-link button\" style=\"float:right;margin:10px\" href=\"https:\/\/www.cartoonstock.com\/blog\/campsite-comic-caption-contest-commentary-with-lawrence-wood\/\" rel=\"nofollow\">Continue Reading&#8230;<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":11,"featured_media":4492,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_genesis_hide_title":false,"_genesis_hide_breadcrumbs":false,"_genesis_hide_singular_image":false,"_genesis_hide_footer_widgets":false,"_genesis_custom_body_class":"","_genesis_custom_post_class":"","_genesis_layout":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[39],"tags":[],"class_list":{"0":"post-4490","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"has-post-thumbnail","7":"category-caption-contest-commentary","8":"entry"},"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.5 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>&quot;Campsite Comic&quot; 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