{"id":5605,"date":"2021-06-22T11:21:11","date_gmt":"2021-06-22T15:21:11","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/blog.cartoonstock.com\/?p=5605"},"modified":"2021-06-22T11:21:11","modified_gmt":"2021-06-22T15:21:11","slug":"sandman-caption-contest-commentary-with-lawrence-wood","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.cartoonstock.com\/blog\/sandman-caption-contest-commentary-with-lawrence-wood\/","title":{"rendered":"&#8220;Sandman&#8221; Caption Contest Commentary with Lawrence Wood"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignright wp-image-5562\" src=\"\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/06\/210308-.jpg\" alt=\"caption contest\" width=\"350\" height=\"238\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.cartoonstock.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/06\/210308-.jpg 800w, https:\/\/www.cartoonstock.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/06\/210308--300x204.jpg 300w, https:\/\/www.cartoonstock.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/06\/210308--768x521.jpg 768w, https:\/\/www.cartoonstock.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2021\/06\/210308--570x390.jpg 570w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 350px) 100vw, 350px\" \/>In Mick Stevens\u2019 cartoon, the Sandman has floated through an open window into the bedroom of a man who\u2019s lying in bed with his eyes wide open. The Sandman, who\u2019s hovering above the bed and wearing a wireless headset, is speaking.<\/p>\n<p>The headset made me think of those Peloton instructors who exhort their clients to push harder and do more. I actually have no experience with such instructors\u2014I haven\u2019t exercised since 1995\u2014but I\u2019ve seen the commercials, and I like the idea of shouting someone to sleep.<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><strong>\u201cLess focus! More fatigue!\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>\u201cSleep! Sleep! Sleep!\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>\u201cCome one, just eight more hours!\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>I then thought of other people who wear wireless headsets:<\/p>\n<p>Telemarketers: <strong>\u201cWe don\u2019t have a \u2018no-float-through-the-window\u2019 list.\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Fast-food workers at drive-thru windows:<strong> \u201cThey promoted me to fly-thru windows.\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>TED Talk presenters: <strong>\u201cTonight\u2019s TED Talk is on sleep deprivation.\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Madonna: <strong>\u201c<em>To<\/em>night\u2026you\u2019ll dream of\u2026San Pedrohhhh.\u201d <\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Now let\u2019s see how you did:<\/p>\n<p>I\u2019ll start with the week\u2019s best puns:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><strong>\u201cI&#8217;ll try to help, but I&#8217;m just a floater.\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>\u201cHe says he&#8217;d prefer Whiskey Man.\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong><em>\u201cBluetooth<\/em><\/strong><strong> fairy, actually.\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>That last entry loses points for starting with the punchline.<\/p>\n<p>Here are the week\u2019s best sex jokes:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><strong>&#8220;Oh, dear. I didn&#8217;t scare her off, did I?&#8221;<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>&#8220;Stop that. You&#8217;ll go blind.&#8221;<\/strong><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>And here\u2019s the week\u2019s best reference to \u201cEnter Sandman,\u201d the opening track and lead single from a heavy metal band\u2019s self-titled fifth album: <strong>\u201cAnd now for some Metallica.\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Like I did, many of you submitted entries that included references to people who wear wireless headsets, such as telemarketers:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><strong>\u201cYou have won a dream vacation.\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>\u201cYour sleep is very important to us&#8230;\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>\u201cSorry I&#8217;m late. We&#8217;ve been experiencing higher-than-normal call volumes.\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>&#8220;No, I&#8217;m just here to notify you about your car&#8217;s extended warranty.&#8221; <\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>&#8220;What if I told you that you could already be sleeping?\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>And fast-food workers: <strong>&#8220;Would you like fries with your sleep disorder?&#8221;<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>And TED Talk presenters:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><strong>&#8220;I&#8217;m the ghost of TED talks past.&#8221;<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>&#8220;Welcome to BED Talk.&#8221;<\/strong><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>No one made a Madonna joke, but here\u2019s a reference to the person who would tell her when to take the stage:<strong> &#8220;You&#8217;re on in five.&#8221;<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>Like that last caption, these entries explain why the man in bed looks so alarmed:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><strong>\u201cI\u2019m hovering above him and throwing sand in his face. I don\u2019t understand why he\u2019s not falling asleep.\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>\u201cI may have thrown too much sand in his eyes.\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>\u201cHe was counting stampeding sheep.\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>\u201cSorry, I ran out of sand. Gravel OK?\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>\u201cHe just became woke.\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>I don\u2019t usually like meta-captions, but this reference to a classic New Yorker cartoon from my boss, Bob Mankoff, deserves recognition because it actually makes sense in the context of the drawing: <strong>\u201cHow about Neverland? Is Neverland good for you?\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>The next set of captions show the Sandman suggesting stronger or alternative measures for putting the man to sleep:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><strong>\u201cThis is a tough one. Send in the Malletman.\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>\u201cGet the mallet.\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>\u201cSend some sheep.\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>\u201cSend more sand.\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>\u201cRequesting backup.\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<li><strong>\u2018This one&#8217;s going to need a Valium.\u201d<\/strong><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>Finally, we have an entry that explains why the Sandman, whose job is to quietly put people to sleep, would be wearing a microphone: <strong>\u201cKeeping people awake is so much easier.\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n<p>This was an unusually tough contest, which might explain why we received only 700 entries. Nevertheless, a more than respectable 4% deserved recognition. The best of these, in my opinion, was an exception to the rule that less is more: <strong>\u201cI\u2019m hovering above him and throwing sand in his face. I don\u2019t understand why he\u2019s not falling asleep.\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n<p align=\"center\"><a class=\"button\" href=\"https:\/\/cartoonstock.com\/blog\/cartoon-caption-contest\/\">ENTER THIS WEEK&#8217;S CAPTION CONTEST<\/a><\/p>\n<p><em>Lawrence Wood has won The New Yorker\u2019s Cartoon Caption Contest a record-setting seven times and been a finalist four other times. He has collaborated with New Yorker cartoonists Peter Kuper, Lila Ash, Felipe Galindo Gomez, and Harry Bliss (until Bliss tossed him aside, as anyone would, to collaborate with Steve Martin). Nine of his collaborations have appeared in The New Yorker, and one is included in The New Yorker Encyclopedia of Cartoons.<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>In Mick Stevens\u2019 cartoon, the Sandman has floated through an open window into the bedroom of a man who\u2019s lying in bed with his eyes wide open. The Sandman, who\u2019s hovering above the bed and wearing a wireless headset, is speaking. The headset made me think of those Peloton instructors who exhort their clients to&#8230; <br \/><a class=\"more-link button\" style=\"float:right;margin:10px\" href=\"https:\/\/www.cartoonstock.com\/blog\/sandman-caption-contest-commentary-with-lawrence-wood\/\" rel=\"nofollow\">Continue Reading&#8230;<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":5606,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_genesis_hide_title":false,"_genesis_hide_breadcrumbs":false,"_genesis_hide_singular_image":false,"_genesis_hide_footer_widgets":false,"_genesis_custom_body_class":"","_genesis_custom_post_class":"","_genesis_layout":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[39],"tags":[],"class_list":{"0":"post-5605","1":"post","2":"type-post","3":"status-publish","4":"format-standard","5":"has-post-thumbnail","7":"category-caption-contest-commentary","8":"entry"},"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v27.3 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/product\/yoast-seo-wordpress\/ -->\n<title>&quot;Sandman&quot; 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