Dan Misdea<\/a>, joined our panel of judges. His drawing is set in a living room, where a man and woman are sitting on their couch. They\u2019re surrounded by beavers, most of whom are gnawing on the furniture. One beaver is on the woman\u2019s head and another is on her right shoulder. The woman is calmly addressing the man, who\u2019s holding a mug of coffee on his lap. Misdea\u2019s original caption alludes to people who unwisely try to domesticate wild animals: <\/span>\u201cThey\u2019re cute but make terrible pets.\u201d<\/b><\/p>\nOne of you made a very similar joke: <\/span>\u201cI love them, but I can never have a Christmas tree.\u201d<\/b><\/p>\nAll of the following entries are good even though they\u2019re not specific to beavers:<\/span><\/b><\/p>\n\n- \u201cI liked it better when you were in the book of the month club.\u201d<\/b><\/li>\n
- \u201cThere are more upstairs. Want to see them?\u201d<\/b><\/li>\n
- \u201cI thought they were both female.\u201d<\/b><\/li>\n
- \u201cI\u2019m picking the next Airbnb.\u201d\u00a0<\/b><\/li>\n
- \u201cWait, I thought they were yours.\u201d<\/b><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n
Here are the month\u2019s best puns:<\/span><\/b><\/p>\n\n- \u201cDammed if you do, dammed if you don\u2019t.\u201d\u00a0<\/b><\/li>\n
- \u201cWe share the same taste in furniture.\u201d<\/b><\/li>\n
- \u201cI miss the dog days of summer.\u201d<\/b><\/li>\n
- \u201cOur cottage is their industry.\u201d<\/b><\/li>\n
- \u201cI met their dad on Timber.\u201d<\/b><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n
That last caption doubles as the month\u2019s best beastiality joke.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\nThe next entry, a pun that doubles as the best erection joke\u2014<\/span>\u201cSure. Protect <\/b>that<\/i><\/b> wood.\u201d<\/b>\u2014led to a surprising debate during the judging process.<\/span> I liked the way it highlighted a seemingly insignificant detail\u2014the placement of the coffee mug\u2014but Mankoff criticized it on the grounds that, and I\u2019m trying to be delicate here, the mug would not be resting that low in the man\u2019s lap if he were actually aroused.<\/span> Here\u2019s a similar joke that addresses Bob\u2019s concern, but it doesn\u2019t quite work because the man is <\/span>holding<\/span><\/i> the coffee mug: <\/span>\u201cGood thing you\u2019re wearing a cup.\u201d<\/b><\/p>\nSurprisingly, and it was a pleasant surprise, we received only two entries that referred to the slang definition of beaver. This was the slightly superior one: <\/span>\u201cI appreciate you curbing your insightful juvenile wit.\u201d <\/b>It would work better, however, without the word \u201cinsightful,\u201d which adds nothing to the joke.<\/span><\/p>\nThe next entry appeared only on Joel Mishon\u2019s top ten list, but when he defended it we all realized how good it is: <\/span>\u201cSo that\u2019s two votes for \u2018Love Actually\u2019 and 14 votes for \u2018A River Runs Through It.\u2019\u201d<\/b> It comes out of left field but works perfectly, not only because the man and woman look like they\u2019re settling in to watch a movie on TV, but because it correctly identifies the number of people and beavers. It\u2019s also a great example of the \u201coblivious speaker\u201d caption, as the woman\u2019s not at all concerned that the beavers are destroying the furniture and gnawing on her shoulder.\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\nHere\u2019s a much shorter \u201coblivious speaker\u201d entry: <\/span>\u201cWhat beavers?\u201d<\/b><\/p>\nAnd speaking of concise captions:\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n\n- \u201cThey\u2019re teething.\u201d<\/b><\/li>\n
- \u201cThey\u2019re rescues.\u201d<\/b><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n
The next three entries refer to beaver impoundments:<\/span><\/p>\n\n- \u201cThe upstairs toilet and upstairs sink and upstairs tub and downstairs toilet and downstairs sink and kitchen sink are clogged.\u201d<\/b><\/li>\n
- \u201cWe\u2019re hoping the dam will be mid-century modern.\u201d<\/b><\/li>\n
- \u201cYou said we needed flood insurance.\u201d<\/b><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n
I love that first caption, but Mankoff said that only shows that my judgment is not as good as my caption contest record suggests.<\/span><\/p>\nHere\u2019s the month\u2019s best mother-in-law joke: <\/span>\u201cAt least they like the furniture your mother picked out.\u201d<\/b><\/p>\nHere\u2019s the best reference to an iconic television sitcom from the 1950s: <\/span>\u201cWard, I’m worried about the beavers.\u201d<\/b><\/p>\nAnd here\u2019s the best divorce joke: <\/span>\u201cI\u2019m leaving you but, for the record, it\u2019s not because of the beavers.\u201d<\/b><\/p>\nThis is a perfectly serviceable entry\u2014<\/span>\u201cThis is why we can’t have nice things.\u201d<\/b>\u2014but it appears so often in crowdsourcing it\u2019s becoming more of a tired clich\u00e9 than a clever joke.<\/span><\/p>\nThis entry refers to a common saying about beavers: <\/span>\u201cI always feel so lazy around them.\u201d<\/b><\/p>\nThis entry puts a clever spin on a common expression by adding the perfect word at the very end: <\/span>\u201cThey\u2019re eating us out of house and home furnishings.\u201d<\/b><\/p>\nI don\u2019t get this caption\u2014<\/span>\u201cAnd then on Tuesday the penguins will be here for buffing and waxing.\u201d\u2014<\/b>but the other judges <\/span>loved<\/span><\/i> it.<\/span><\/p>\nThis next entry notes that beavers and maple trees are both found in popular outdoor tourist destinations: <\/span>\u201cA souvenir jar of maple syrup would have been fine.\u201d\u00a0<\/b><\/p>\nI like the way this entry drops us into the middle of a discussion about the beavers, and suggests that man has just said something very stupid:\u00a0 <\/span>\u201cActually, it\u2019s not anything like ants at a picnic.\u201d<\/b><\/p>\nThis captions suggests the beavers are in the market for a new home: <\/span>\u201cI think they might make an offer.\u201d<\/b><\/p>\nAnd finally, we have the woman asserting a less than compelling defense of her decision to hoard beavers: <\/span>\u201cAt least I\u2019m not a crazy cat lady.\u201d\u00a0<\/b><\/p>\nCongratulations to MARC SIEGEL, who submitted this month\u2019s winning caption: <\/span>\u201cSo that\u2019s two votes for \u2018Love Actually\u2019 and 14 votes for \u2018A River Runs Through It.\u2019\u201d <\/i><\/b>The five runners-up are:<\/span><\/p>\n\n- \u201cAnd then on Tuesday the penguins will be here for buffing and waxing.\u201d<\/i><\/b><\/li>\n
- \u201cA souvenir jar of maple syrup would have been fine.\u201d<\/i><\/b><\/li>\n
- \u201cActually, it\u2019s not anything like ants at a picnic.\u201d<\/i><\/b><\/li>\n
- \u201cI thought they were both female.\u201d<\/i><\/b><\/li>\n
- \u201cI\u2019m picking the next Airbnb.\u201d<\/i><\/b><\/li>\n
Watch the Judging Process<\/h3>\n
or those of you who want to see how we made our selections, we recorded the process with Dan and its posted here (in 2 parts!)<\/p>\n
![\"CartoonStock](\"https:\/\/www.cartoonstock.com\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2023\/03\/123Beavers_Misdea-300x195.jpg\")
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