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"Now, how can I be of assistance?"
'On your way to Emerald City, could you drop me off at the E.R.?'
Huckleberry Finn, M.D.
"There will be a bit of a wait while we figure out a market solution to your problem."
"Dr. Eliot, would you let the dog out?"
"Dr. Lutz is the city's top funny bone man."
NHS Confederation suggest that patients be allowed to register with A&E Departments.
"It's great to see so many new faces her tonight!"
'No! This isn't the place to order a blood transfusion!'
NHS Confederation suggests that patients be allowed to register with A&E departments..."Can someone help me I've got a bit of a cough!"
'It looks like your son hasn't changed his underwear in a year,'
"Is your injury sports-related?"
"Do you know your name? Do you know where you are? Do you remember the accident? Do you know you had a hole in your underpants?"
Clean underwear for sale.
"His last words sort of came out … 'AAARRGHH AAAARRRGGHHH' …."
"Can't you fellas read the sign? I can't let you wheel him in here."
"You the one who got his hand stuck in the elevator?"
Biggest heimlich maneuver ever recorded.
Emergency room notice - 'Wait hours, or go home'
It was the busiest department in the hospital.
"The bad news that he was knocked down by an ambulance but the good news is that it's done wonders for our response times!"
Emergency: "Waiting long?"
How to win at hospital league tables
'According to his wife, he took a clobbering on Wall Street.'
'Why do we have to see the doctor? Why couldn't Grandma sew me up?'