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Initially excited about the possibilities of email, God lost interest when he discovered someone was already using his favorite screen name.
'You're not bidding on something again, are you? . . . So when some goofy item and a debit in our account show up at roughly the same time, I am to assume what?'
"Catherine would like to share some holiday thoughts with us on the subject of gender-neutral toys."
Tags:gender neutral, holiday, holidays, christmas, christmas season, holiday season, dinner, dinners, politically correct, political correctness, speech, speeches, liberal, liberals, address, addresses, addressing, christmas dinner, christmas dinners, xmas, x-mas, pc, pc culture, politically correct culture, pray, prays, praying, prayer, prayers, modern life, modern times
Tags:trump, donald trump, president donald trump, speech, speeches, president, presidents, us president, address, addresses, addressing, nation, addressing the nation, coronavirus, covid, covid-19, pandemic, pandemics, virus, viruses, apocalypse, apocalypses, end of the world, disaster, disasters, world disaster, world disasters, resident, residents, panic, panics, reassure, reassuring, denial, deny, denies, denying, leader, leaders, the news, world news
"He always makes a fool of himself when he addresses the nation."
Tags:address, addresses, presidential address, presidential addresses, king, kings, expose, exposes, self-aware, self-awareness, speech, speeches, flasher, flashers, idiot, idiots, president, presidents, speech, speeches, politician, politicians, fool, fools, make a fool of himself, making a fool of himself
'If you'll give me an advance on my allowance, I'll show you how to get the little circle around the 'a' on all your email addresses.'
If Ben Franklin Still Ran the Post Office.
Tags:trump, president trump, president donald trump, post office, post offices, united states postal service, postal service, u.s.p.s., us postal service, benjamin franklin, ben franklin, founding father, founding fathers, russia, parcel, parcels, forward address, address, addresses, conspire, conspires, conspiring, security, call security, calling security, presidential election 2020, postal vote, postal votes, postal voting, informant, informants, informing, coronavirus, covid, covid-19, caught, catch
Modern relationships on mailboxes.
Tags:divorced, divorce, divorce culture, marriage, modern marriage, modern marriages, single mom, single moms, joint custody, blended family, blended families, issue, issues, working on issues, modern relationships, modern life, modern family, modern families, visitation, visitation rights, broken home, broken homes, mailbox, mailboxes, address, addresses
'It's the latest Catalogue of Errors. And they've sent it to the wrong address.'
'Pardon me. Can you tell me where 9 West 57th is?'
After the introductin of Google street view Ed becomes the first casualty of Google Tonsils.
"I'm afraid I can't help you. I'm from New Zealand, and all I know is sheep."
Tags:man, men, stranger, strangers, asking for directions, directions, lost, confused, map, maps, address, addresses, pedestrian, pedestrians, help, helping, unhelpful, assist, assisting, useless, city, cities, urban, new zealand, kiwi, kiwis, new zealander, new zealanders, tourist, tourists, street, streets, animal, animals, sheep, herd, herds, flock, flocks, shepherd, shepherds, stereotype, stereotypes, farm, farms, farmer, farmers, know, knowledge, traveler, traveler, traveller, travellers
"Why only 'bag dog'? You never hear 'bad cat', 'bad horse', 'bad cow'..."
Tags:bar, bars, pub, pubs, dog, dogs, drink, drinks, drinking, sad, discipline, disciplined, disciplining, disciplinary, bad dog, bad dogs, animal, animals, pet, pets, scold, scolding, scolded, annoy, annoys, annoying, dishearten, disheartenend, deflated, bully, bullies, bullying, bad cat, bad horse, bad cow, hear, hears, hearing, unheard of, saying, sayings, address, addresses, addressing, drinking away one's sorrows
'I can remember my PIN, password and post code, bit I've forgotten my name.'
The speech was almost interesting. People began to sit up and fake interest.
'Uh-huh...yep, got that. '27 lock street, around 8:30.''
'This must be the place!'
'I'll also need your home address, phone number and social security number.'
'I said I wanted to address the manager shortage -- not a short manager!'
Door changing from "707" to "LOL"
"Preparing to Cross the Alps: Hannibal's Address to his Elephants
Tags:history, historical, ancient, rome, roman, romans, roman empire, carthage, carthaginian, hannibal, second punic war, crossing the alps, animal, animals, elephant, elephants, pachyderm, pachyderms, african, africans, problem, problems, speech, speeches, address, addresses, addressing, speaking, army, armies, war, wars, military, military strategy, military strategies, understand, understanding, encouragement, encouraging, inspiration, inspirational, inspiring, nothing to lose
'Hi. We're here for the abduction...'
"Nothing fancy. Just my current address."
Tags:tattoo, tattoos, tattoo parlour, tattoo parlours, tattooist, tattooists, address, addresses, skin art, fashion statement, fashion statements, fashions, fashionable, home address, home addresses, absent minded, absent-minded, forgetful, pensioner, pensioners, senior citizen, senior citizens, oap, oaps, old-age, old age
GOP State of the Union response.
"Houston, Los Angeles, New York, Chicago, Tampa, Juneau, Honolulu, we have a problem."
Tags:space, outer space, space craft, space ship, space ships, space station, international, international space station, astronaut, astronauts, problem, problems, issue, issues, error, errors, houston, los angeles, new york, chicago, tampa, juneau, honolulu, call, calls, video call, video calls, speak, speaks, speaking, address, addresses, addressing