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'Great, and I'll also need some mirrors.'
'Shall we allow a near-term consideration of 'ethics' to lower profit margins? . . . . I think we're better than that!'
Dividends fall whilst executive pay rises - 'As you know, ladies and gentlemen, charity begins at home.'
'Loved your bit on market share, Felton - perfect blend of plausibility and outright deception.'
'According to our research only ten percent of what we do is reprehensible, but it accounts for one hundred percent of our profits.'
"Let's try it again, sir - but with a tad more conviction when you tell the lies."
"What are the shareholders complaining about? I make less than a Premier League footballer."
'...and I would also like to deny that I spend all my time on the golf course.'
'We'll start with the minutes of next year's AGM.'
'...nurse Flemmer will be out in the lobby doing shareholder triage.'
Just be ready to duck.
"Firstly, I'd like to thank you all for coming."