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'I'll give it back to you in a second hon, I just want to get this broccoli out of my teeth.'
"I think I've found the trouble, Mr. Nadler!"
Tags:diagnose, diagnoses, diagnosing, diagnosis, diagnoses, problem, problems, bite, bites, biting, doctor, doctors, family doctor, family doctors, ailment, ailments, ill, illness, illnesses, sick, sickness, sicknesses, problem, problems, health problem, health problems, monkey on your back, monkeys on your back, anxiety, anxieties, anxious, anxiousness, worry, worries, worrying, stress, stress management
"There was no large metal object in your rib cage after all. Turns out I was just seeing this old-timey doctor thing on my forehead."
"I'm sorry, but you've had it up to here."
Tags:senior, senior citizen, seniors, senior citizens, old, age, aging, aged, old age, old aged, doctor, doctors, physician, physicians, physical, physicals, examination, examinations, health, doctor's office, doctor's offices, clinic, clinics, hospital, hospitals, medical, medicine, stress, stressful, worry, worries, diagnosis, diagnose, ailment, ailments, pensioner
'It's bad news I'm afraid. Your illness isn't on our performance targets.'
'I've been under a lot of pressure, lately, doc.'
'Everything came back negative.'
'Medical researcher have isolated the gene that makes us want to discuss our ailments with anyone we meet.'
'Good news...the rattling is not in your lungs.'
'I'm afraid your complaining is chronic.' - 'I want a second opinion!!'
'You play the nurse and I'll play God.'
'Don't you hate it when there are parts left over?'
'I'm going to refer you to a podiatrist, Achilles.'
'In my professional opinion, your immune system is over-stimulated.'
'This operation should remove the swelling in your wallet - I mean, knee.'
'You've got the shingles.'
CHRONIC FATIGUE IRRITABLE BOWEL SYNDROME.
'You should really consider covering it up. Or maybe even staying home.'
'Well, at least we were able to remove that pesky hangnail. So, you have to be pretty stoked about that."
Tags:medical surgical, surgeon, surgeons, hangnail, hangnails, surgery, accident, accidental, unplanned, doctor, doctors, surgeons, ailment, reparation, redemption, redeeming quality, laughter, jokes, joking, optimistic, optimism, bright side, twisted, warped, sense of humour, sense of humor, bedside manner
"Sick? You're not sick! The money I owe on my student loans... now that's sick!"
'Good news! That spot is B-9!'
'What do you mean you're the new Paediatric Specialist?'
'I'm afraid there's not much I can do for you now. You should've come in sooner, before you got sick.'
'I couldn't diagnose this ailment on the internet, so I was forced to come to you.'