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The latest innovation in air travel: convertible jets.
'Where are you headed?' 'Oh, I'm just here for the food.'
'Please put your tray table and seat in their upright and locked position... ooh! Didn't say Simon Sez.'
'Would you mind holding my hand Jim? The truth is, I'm deathly afraid of flying.'
"I'm sorry, but the flight of the bumblebees has been cancelled."
Tags:flight, flight of the bumblebee, piano, piano player, piano players, pianist, pianists, bumblebee, bumblebees, bee, bees, airline, airlines, flight delay, flight delays, cancellation, cancellations, canceled, cancelled, cancel, cancels, air travel, frequent flyer, frequent flyers, rimsky korsakov, korsakov, composition, compositions, entomologist, entomologists, entomology
Grim reaper waiting for someone in the arrivals area of an airport
Tags:air travel, airport, airports, arrivals, arrivals area, arrivals hall, waiting, wait, sign, signs, name, names, death, grim reaper, grim reapers, reaper, reapers, embodiment of death, death personified, spectre of death, thanatos, angel of death, waiting area, waiting areas, driver, drivers, pick-up, pick-up area, pickup, pickup area, passenger, passengers, traveler, travelers, travellers, travellers
"It's my first time up!"
"I want an aisle seat in no smoking, lots of fresh air, proper maintenance, no cracks in the fuselage - and none of your frigging bug spray!"
Tags:airport, airports, air travel, air travels, difficult customer, difficult customers, tricky customer, tricky customers, fussy customer, fussy customers, flight, flights, customer satisfaction, customer experience, customer experience, aisle seat, aisle seats, non-smoking, bug spray, big sprays, grump, grumpy, old lady, old ladies, senior citizen, senior citizens, oap, oaps, pensioner, pensioners, old age, old-age
Cow on the Luggage Carousel
"Can I use my frequent flier miles?"
Tags:religion, religious, death, after death, afterlife, heaven, heaven's gate, entrance to heaven, entering heaven, st. peter's gate, saint peter's gate, pearly gates, st. peter, saint peter, angel, angels, airline, airlines, airline points, frequent flier, frequent fliers, miles, points, frequent flier points, frequent flier miles, frequent flyer, frequent flyers, frequent flyer miles, frequent flyer points, travelling, traveller, travellers, traveling, traveler, travelers, flying, air travel, points card, points cards, collecting points, collecting miles
A passenger on a plane watches as a truck labeled "Lostluggage.com" drives away from the plane he is on.
Tags:air travel, airport, airports, airline, airlines, airplane, airplanes, aeroplane, aeroplanes, plane, planes, flying, flight, flights, luggage, baggage, bag, bags, lost, lost & found, lost and found, truck, trucks, lorry, lorries, problem, problems, customer service, service, modern life, traveler, travelers, travellers, travellers, passenger, passengers, traveling, travelling
"It's mine—and I'd appreciate your not looking out of it."
Tags:airplane, airplanes, aeroplane, aeroplanes, air travel, flying, plane, planes, passenger, passengers, seat, seats, window seat, windows seats, window, windows, travel, traveling, travelling, traveler, travelers, traveller, travellers, look out, look, looking, mine, possessive, greedy, greed, selfish, controlling, neighbour, neighbours, neighbor, neighbors
An aircraft marshal helps a limousine park
"At this time, we'd like to begin boarding our 'It's all about me' members."
Tags:air travel, airport, airports, airline, airlines, airplane, airplanes, aeroplane, aeroplanes, plane, planes, flying, flight, flights, traveler, travelers, traveling, travellers, travellers, travelling, passenger, passengers, boarding, announcement, announcements, member, members, membership, narcissism, narcissist, narcissists, ego, egotistic, egoist, egoists, egotistical, vain, vanity, selfish, self-centered, self-centred, modern line
"Book me, seat me, treat me bad."
Tags:airplane, airplanes, aeroplane, aeroplanes, plane, planes, flight, flights, passenger, passengers, customer service, customer services, customer satisfaction, airport, airports, air travel, customer experience, customer experiences, booking, bookings, unhappy customers, dissatisfied customer, dissatisfied customers
"Sometimes I think I'd serve the nation better at the approach to Kennedy International."
Tags:uncle sam, statue of liberty, lady liberty, liberty enlightening the world, united states, us, u.s., united states of america, usa, u.s.a., america, american, american symbol, american symbols, personification, serving the nation, john f. kennedy international airport, kennedy international, airport, airports, immigration, immigrant, immigrants, welcoming, travel, air travel, modern life
Prison on an airplane
Tags:prison, prisons, jail, jails, correctional facility, correctional facilities, airplane, airplanes, aeroplane, aeroplanes, flying, air travel, passenger, passengers, confined, stuck, cabin, cabins, locked up, trapped, miserable, misery, terrible, horrible, experience, experiences, modern life, travel, traveling, travelling, air, walls, wall, airline, airlines
Tags:budget cut, budget cuts, airline, airlines, airliner, airliners, flight, flights, frequent flyer, frequent flyers, stewardess, stewardesses, flight attendant, flight attendants, cabin crew, cabin crews, air travel, air travels, air travelling, airplane, airplanes, aeroplane, aeroplanes, cost-saving, cost-saving measure, cost-saving measures, meal, meals, in-flight meal, in-flight meals
Einstein discovers that time can stop completely.
Tags:einstein, time, nature of time, wait, waits, airport, airports, air travel, plane travel, plane travels, trolley, trolleys, theory of relativity, general theory of relativity, gate, gates, board, boards, boarding, long wait, long waits, stop, stops, stopping, time stopping, impatient, impatience, hurry, hurries, hurrying, hurry up, hurries up, airport terminal, airport terminals, frustration, frustrations, first world problem, first world problems
"O.K. just one more item. Who gets the frequent-flier miles?"
Tags:divorce, divorced, divorcing, separation, separating, divorce proceedings, divorce settlement, divorce settlements, frequent-flier miles, frequent flier, frequent flier miles, frequent flyer, frequent flyer miles, frequent-flyer, frequent-flyer miles, air travel, airplane travel, aeroplane travel, frequent flyers, frequent fliers, frequent-flyers, frequent-fliers, air miles, airmiles, divorce financial settlements, splitting assets, asset splitting, division of assets, lawyers, lawyer, attorney, attorneys
A flighttime story
"We have no more wine from California. Would you like some maple syrup from Vermont?"
Tags:air travel, airline, airlines, airplane, airplanes, aeroplane, aeroplanes, air hostess, air hostesses, air stewardess, air stewardesses, flight attendant, flight attendants, cabin attendant, cabin attendants, stewardess, stewardesses, cabin crew, passenger, passengers, traveller, travellers, traveler, travelers, wine, california, vermont, maple syrup, local product, local products, local speciality, local specialities, food, drink, drinks, alcohol, alcoholic, drinking, meal service, meal services, sold out, gone, no more, replacement, replacements, substitute, substitutes
"Say, buddy - how about a little something for the landing?"
"A trillion bottles of beer on the wall, a trillion bottles of beer..."
Tags:space travel, travel, travels, travelling, traveling, road trip, road trips, song, songs, singalong, singalongs, long drive, long drives, long flight, long flights, flight, flights, air travel, bottles of beer, vacation, vacations, family vacation, family vacations, rocket, rockets, rocketship, rocketships, rocket ship, rocket ships
"We don't consider you luggage 'lost', we like to think it's off on an adventure."