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"I'd give my right arm to play the violin like you do, Mr. Bolenska."
Tags:violin, violins, violinist, violinists, orchestra, orchestras, envy, envies, envious, enviousness, classical, classical music, musician, musicians, amputee, amputees, amputate, amputates, amputation, wish, wishes, wishing, jealous, jealousy, admire, admires, admiring, admiration, right arm, right arms, expression, expressions, literal, literal interpretation, literal interpretations, fan, fans, fan girl, fan girls
'He's a specialist,,, And he assures us that he tried everything - but the leg just couldn't be saved,'
Tags:rabbit, rabbits, bunny, bunnies, doctor, doctors, giant, giants, eat, eats, eaten, leg, legs, limb, limbs, specialist, specialists, amputate, amputates, amputated, amputation, lost, fat, fatty, overweight, obese, obesity, assure, assures, assurance, assurances, the argyle sweater, argyle sweater
"Nooo. Not my legs."
Tags:serpent, serpents, snake, snakes, garden of eden, eden, god, old testament, genesis, book of genesis, bible story, bible stories, curse, curses, cursing, adam and eve, original sin, leg, legs, lose your legs, loses your legs, losing your legs, leg loss, amputation, amputations, amputate, amputates, amputating
Employees must wash hands.
Tags:hand, hands, employees must wash hands, bathroom, bathrooms, toilet, toilets, sign, signs, clean, cleans, cleaning, cleanliness, employee, employees, hygiene, hygienic, unhygienic, condition, conditions, toilet, toilets, toilet break, toilet breaks, potty break, potty breaks, bathroom break, bathroom breaks, dismember, dismembers, dismembering, dismemberment, amputation, amputations, amputate, amputates, amputating, letter of the law
Four Legs Good, Two Legs Bad - Three Legs OK: Bloomin Middle Ground Politics.
'I accidentally removed his right hand, but to keep him balanced, I removed his left foot, free of charge.'
Man has his fingers taken off by a hand dryer.
Tags:dryer, dryers, drying, hand dryer, hand dryers, hand drier, hand driers, dries, restroom, restrooms, bathroom, bathrooms, toilet, toilets, amputation, amputate, amputates, finger, fingers, digit, digits, hand, hands, cut off, cuts off, cutting off, wash, washes, washing, clean, cleans, cleaning
"You'll need this stick."
'He still doesn't know how serious an amputation he's had, nurse, so try not to act too shocked.'
Being footloose and fancy-free wasn't much fun.
I have learned how to solve most of these Sharpei dermatological problems...
A snowman missing his base begs for change.
Tags:amputee, amputees, amputation, amputations, amputate, amputates, sled, sleds, snow, snows, snowy, winter, winters, winter weather, beggar, beggars, begging, beg, begs, panhandle, panhandles, panhandling, panhandler, panhandlers, homeless, homelessness, homeless person, homeless people, unfortunate, less fortunate, charity, charities, charitable donation, charitable donations, donation, donations, donor, donors
'Hmm...Nurse, bring me my chainsaw.'
"I used to have tattoos. They're a lot easier to get than to have removed."
Hand Dryer Out of Order.
"Your husband is gonna pull through. But we were, um, unable to save one of his legs. Yeah, that's it."
Tags:doctor, doctors, biscuit, biscuits, gingerbread, ginger bread, nurse, nurses, surgeons, surgeon, operation, operations, operating room, operating rooms, patient, patients, eat, eats, eating, greedy, sweet tooth, sweet tooths, medical, medicine, surgery, elective, amputation, amputate, amputates, amputee, amputees, dessert, desserts, pudding, puddings, sweets, bread, breads, cakes, cakes, stuffed
"The good news is we were able to save your leg..."
Following an especially difficult divorce.
"Those government guidelines are sharp!"
Juggler loses his arm.
'I made the turn at second base and heard a 'pop' in my knee... Is it serious?'
Tags:baseball, base ball, injury, injuries, sports injury, sports injuries, injured, leg, legs, pop, pops, popping, popped, knee, knees, broken leg, broken legs, snap, snaps, snapped, snapping, separate, separates, separated, amputate, amputates, amputated, lose, loses, lost, in the bleachers, bleachers, in the bleachers
'I'm afraid we've removed your wooden leg by mistake.'
Getrude slowly realized her career in the family store might be terribly short...
Tags:short career, short careers, new job, new jobs, gift wrap, gift wraps, gift wrapping, gift wrapping department, gift wrapping departments, present, presents, gift, gifts, wrap, wraps, wrapping, amputate, amputates, amputating, digit, digits, finger, fingers, tie up, ties up, workplace accident, workplace accidents, worker's comp, worker's compensation, injury, injuries, department store, department stores
Man breaks his finger off with a clapper board.
An man with an axe removes tattoos.