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'And here's Ted with his, always accurate, post-market predictions.'
'Having conducted a comprehensive analysis of dozens of subsets of data from a wide range of sources we've confirmed that the likely answer is 36...now we just need to identify the question.'
'And from what we've been able to determine, this is the tweak that broke the paradigm's back.'
(Jump!) (I'm doing a risk/reward analysis.) (Good boy.) (Accountant's Dog)
Tags:good boy, good boys, accountant, accountants, risk, reward, rewards, risks, analysis, animal, animals, talking dog, talking dogs, talking animal, talking animals, talking pet, talking pets, dog, dogs, pup, pups, puppy, puppies, lap dog, lap dogs, pet, pets, pet owner, pet owners, dog owner, dog owners, dog training, command, commands
Tags:sport, sports, football, american football, quarterback, quaterbacks, armchair quarterback, armchair quarterbacks, player, players, athlete, athletes, fan, fans, sports fan, sports fans, football fan, football fans, football fanatic, football fanatics, analyse, analysis, commentary, football commentary, quarter, quarters, game, games, match, matches, play, plays, great play, know-it-all, armchair, armchairs, after the game, post-game, postgame, post-game commentary, postgame commentary
"The exhaustive analysis of our nation's predicament has arrived."
Tags:predicament, predicaments, analysis, analyses, party, parties, cocktail party, cocktail parties, wealthy elite, wealthy elites, diagnose, diagnoses, diagnosing, know-it-all, know-it-alls, bore, bores, social pariah, social pariahs, state of the world, opinion, opinions, opinionated, uninformed, strong opinion, strong opinions, outcast, outcasts, social outcast, social outcasts
'If it's any consolation, our lack of business innovation will be the subject of analysis in some of the finest M.B.A. programs in the country.'
'Thanks, Brian, for your thoughtful and constructive proposal. Without further ado, we'll now dive into malicious, envy-based criticism, character assassination and petty bickering!'
Al's punditry barn
'At this point, I'll ask all of you to follow me to the conference room directly below us!'
'This is quite a scathing memo, Jane. Would you mind elaborating on the 'pervasive herd mentality' you claim our firm is riddled with?'
"This isn't a sales call? Aren't all calls, in the final analysis, sales calls?"
'This red line indicates the change in this red line over a period of time,'
"The tone of the letter is stern, almost threatening, but - see here? - he signs with a smiley face, so I think we may be alright."
Tags:memo, memos, written communication, written communications, letter, letters, non verbal communication, non-verbal communications, subtext, subtexts, stern, tone, analysis, lawyer, lawyers, literary criticism, literary critics, attorney, attorneys, tones, sternness, smiley, smileys, smiley face, smiley faces, emoticon, emoticons, literary analysis, deconstruction
At a creative writing workshop for accountants.
"I got my DNA analysis back. Guess what - I'm a Hapsburg."
Tags:relationship, relationships, love, marriage, marriages, married life, couple, couples, husband, husbands, wife, wives, spouse, spouses, science, biology, genetics, gene, genes, dna, d.n.a., dna testing, genetic testing, analysis, result, results, history, historical, ancestor, ancestors, ancestry, family tree, genealogy, genealogist, genealogists, family history, lineage, hapsburg, hapsburgs, family, families, royal, royalty, regal, crown, crowns
"What? You were expecting good news? Expectations are so-o-o-o passe."
"David, you're denying your feelings again, aren't you?"
Tags:deny, denial, defense, defense mechanism, monster, monsters, memory, memories, feel, feelings, emotion, emotions, disavowal, disavow, avoid, avoidance, reality, realities, stress, stressful, anxiety, anxieties, fear, fears, psychology, psychologist, psychiatry, therapy, therapist, psychiatry, psychiatrist, lcsw, social work, social worker, analysis, analyst, psycho analyst, psycho analysis, depression, depressive
"My goodness, Marion. Our dishes are so spotless, I can see deep within my hollow, tormented soul!"
Tags:unhappy marriage, unhappy marriages, unhappy, misery, miserable, depressed, depression, depressing, clinical depression, reflection, reflections, chore, chores, household chore, household chores, spotless, clean, cleans, cleaning, clean up, cleans up, cleaning up, torment, soul, souls, tormented, plate, plates, washing up, psychology, psychologist, psychologists, psychiatrist, psychiatrists, psychiatry, analysis, analyst, analysts, id, freud, freudian
'This prediction has a margin of error of plus or minus fifteen...fifteen class-action suits brought against the company.'
The Dr. Fairy Godmother Show: 'OK, if I were to fix that... And trust me, it ain't gonna happen... What long-term effect would that really have on your life?'
'We ran a full DNA test, STR and Mitochondrial analysis... and Bob here 'Googled' it just to make sure.'
Reading my Critics