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'Is there a chance you will die under the anaesthetic? Well, that is the killer question.'
'We tend to favour more traditional anaesthetic techniques here.'
"And now, my mother, Mrs. Knable, will put you to sleep with tales of her arthritis."
'Shall I give it to you straight, or would you like some mild anesthetic?'
'Since you can't tolerate anesthetics, severall of our personnel will hold you down.'
'You'll be awake during the entire procedure because our anesthetic has been recalled by the FDA.'
'The Nobel prize for medicine was awarded to Dr. Quentin R. Owlsey, who developed an anesthetic that leaves patients capable of writing checks.'
Patients with HMO dread anesthesia.
"We're running a little behind, but we'd be happy to have our anesthesiologist put you under for a few hours, until the doctor is ready to see you."
'Hey, there's some clown here that says we got his order by mistake.'
"Wait, Jeff. Our new policy is to ask our guests to leave the room before discussing confidential matters. No need for the chloroform."
Tags:chloroform, drug, drugs, anaesthetics, anaesthetic, anaesthetia, anesthetics, anesthetic, anesthetia, boardroom, boardrooms, board, boards, businessmen, businessman, corporate culture, corporate environment, corporate environments, confidential discussion, confidential discussions, confidential matters, company policy, corporate policy, company policies, policy change, policy changes
Things you don't want to hear or why they make sure you're asleep
Tags:anaesthesia, anesthesia, anesthetic, anesthetics, anaesthetic, anaesthetics, cavemen, caveman, prehistory, prehistoric, neanderthal, neanderthals, painkiller, painkillers, pain-killer, pain-killers, surgeon, surgeons, surgery, surgeries, club, clubs, spear, spears, wound, wounds, injury, injuries, medical science, medical scientist, medical scientists, medical history, history of medicine
'If we taped their incoherent ramblings under anesthesia it would make a great reality show.'
It's a text from the patient. He says 'more anesthetic, please.'"
'And now for the anesthesia: I've got plenty of conventional anesthetics I could use here but you can also choose to spend half an hour on the phone with my mother...'
'Which would you prefer, the local or the general?'
'Let's just say. . . you toss and turn a lot in your sleep!'
'He's not under yet.'
'I'm sorry but we're out of our usual anesthetics.'
'Now just relax and you'll never notice when that tooth is extracted.'
Word Play: Anaesthetic.
'I want a tooth extracted now and don't have time for anaesthetic. Lie down Charles and show him your him your tooth!'