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Never fails. Stay in all week, not one call. Step out for an hour to preach...
'Click-beep-click...you have six new apocalyptic messages.'
On telemarketing answermachine: 'Please hold. You're call is very important to us...unless you're trying to sell something to us!'
'Your call is important to us...but not important encough for us to hire additional staff to talk to you.'
'R2-D2 is not in. Please leave a message after the beep-wheep-zip-booop ...'
Phone rings, bizarre contraption moves towards it. Man says: 'Let the machine get it.'
Click...'Heaven is unable to get to the phone at the moment, but if you'd like to leave your prayers at the sound of the tone, they will be answered.'
'This is 911! Sorry we can't take your call right now, our place is on fire!!'
'My answering machine just threatened to get its number changed if I don't stop bothering it'
'A real person's answered it. I hate that. I'll call back when their voicemail's activated.'
'The person you called may be toying with the olive in her cocktail, please try again later.'