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'This is the voice mailbox of Rip Van Winkle. You have forty seven thousand two hundred and six messages...'
Tags:rip van winkle, story, stories, short story, short stories, time, times, timed, timing, time goes by, time gone by, time going by, aging, aged, answer phone, answer machine, phone, phones, phoned, phoning, message, messages, answerphone, answer phone messages, mailbox, the flying mccoys, flying mccoys
"I'm away from my desk right now..."
Never fails. Stay in all week, not one call. Step out for an hour to preach...
'Sorry, no one is here, however, your money is important to us...so leave your name and number, and we'll get back to you...'
Perfect end to a lousy day - man praying gets God's answer machine.
'You have no new messages!...You have no old messages! Get a life!'
"Sorry, sir, you'll have to hang on some more, but I'm going to advance you to priority-hold status."
Tags:on hold, telephone operator, telephone operators, phonecall, phonecalls, answer phone, answer phones, answering machine, answering machines, modern life modern times, modern technology, modern technologies, automated answering machine, automated answering machines, priority, priorities, wait, waiting, queue, queuing, phone queue, phones queues, telephone queue, telephone queues, big corporation, big corporations
"His lordship is unable to answer the phone as he doesn't like to speak with his mouth full..."
'You have one new message and three saved messages.'
'R2-D2 is not in. Please leave a message after the beep-wheep-zip-booop ...'
S�ance "I'm through to your husbands voice-mail"
'That is your fully automated customer care system.'
Battersea dogs home - dog answering the 'phone
"If you are having trouble landing please press one..."
'Your call is important enough to us to have me coming live as we speak!'
'Please hold... we're going for a record on seeing how long customers will wait...'
'... Press 7 to admit defeat...'
'At the sound of the tone, please leave a message.. unless you're trying to sell me something.'
'Sorry, my wife can't take your call at the moment. This is her answer phone.'
Phoning a Busy Sheep: 'Sorry I can't get to the phone right now, please make an animal noise after the bleat!'
'Oh, b***ocks! I've left my mobile phone at home.' - 'People will think I'm avoiding their calls.' - '' - 'Later, at home...' - 'You have no new messages.' - 'Oh.' -
'Sorry, I'm not available. Please leave a message and I'll get back to you.'
"I can't find my stupid phone, so leave a message..."
'At that moment, He is in conference. At the beep, you will have sixty seconds to say your prayers...this is a recording...'
'I can't take your call right now. Please leave a message after the peep.'