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"You have no new messages."
'If you wish to be put on hold, press one...'
'Stop leaving messages for me you crazy woman! We had one date but I don't want to see you again!! Got it??!' 'He phoned...'
'This is a recording???'
While You Were Here
Tags:phone message, phone messages, message, messages, phone call, phone calls, answering machine, answering machines, answerphone, answerphones, leave a message, leaves a message, leaving a message, miss out, misses out, missing out, milestone, milestones, checkbox, checkboxes, secretary, secretaries
'Law offices...warning: all calls may be recorded for blackmail purposes...'
"You have reached the home of Henry and Maureen Wells. If you are selling something, press 1; if you are asking for money, press 2; if you want to talk about phone service, press 3."
Tags:parent, parents, wealthy parent, wealthy parents, message, answering machine, answering machines, answerphone, answerphones, lazy, laziness, phone call, phone calls, landline, landlines, voice mail, voice mails, messages, leave a message, cold call, cold calls, unwanted, undesirable, annoyance, annoyances
Your call is important to us, but not enough to hire additional staff thank you.
"You have reached someone who does not answer the phone after 8 p.m. If this is a matter of life and death, it will likely be resolved by morning."
'You have one new message and three saved messages.'
"Everything I say goes straight to voice mail."
Tags:voicemail, voice mail, message, messages, answering machine, answering machines, answerphone, answerphones, complex, complex, inferiority complex, inferiority complexes, paranoia, paranoid, paranoid delusion, paranoid delusions, delusional, therapist, therapists, therapy, psychiatrist, psychiatrists, psychiatry
'Press 1 for classical, press 2 for easy listening or press 3 for jazz.'
'At the sound of the tone, please leave a message.. unless you're trying to sell me something.'
BT Callminder...you have no friends.
'I can't take your call right now. Please leave a message after the peep.'
RIP R Jones, Practical Joker: 'Sorry, you're calling at a bad time. I'm dead.'
'Can you please hold for ocean sounds? Our computers are temporarily down.'
'...leave your name and number, our weapons of mass destruction will get back to your weapons of mass destruction...'
'Thank you for calling Bemis and Associates...your call is not important to us because we've gone bankrupt.'
'You don't say! I'm a recording, too!'
'...Acrimonious divorce, press 12, if you are feeling suicidal, press 13, if you are...'
"What do you mean: 'You don't believe that this is my answerphone'? Do you think I'd lie?"
'Their answering machine wants to talk to our answering machine!'
'He says he's not available at the present - but leave a message after the third puff...'
Earl hated his answerphone - 'You have no messages...who'd call you anyhow?'