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'So, yeah! Take it home, look it over, and if anybody has any feedback my door is always open.'
'What would you say if I told you there's a way to fit all of that on just one tablet?'
Moses' Reading Glasses
'Just try to collect.'
"Are you sure you need to make a large print version available?"
"And there's also an FAQ section at the end."
"That's not the type of ark I was talking about."
"If you used a smaller font they would all fit on one tablet."
"He said take two tablets and call him in the morning."
"Did he say 'commandments' or 'suggestions'?"
'I thought the pop-ups would give it that extra punch. Whataya think?'
'Okay, now...while holding down the commandment key, type in the number ten.'
'These are a little harsh. Why don't you take time off for some r and r and rewrite them when you're in a better mood?'
'My people told me if I submit this through the proper channels, they'll consider it and get back to me, but only if they're interested!'
'No, they're not the same rules they read before a boxing match.'
'They're colonizing Mars! Maybe you should write up a whole new set of rules for them!'
'No! There isn't an option to unsubscribe!'
"Moses carried forty pound tablets down the mountain with no back brace? Where was OSHA?"
Moses and the Ten Commandments - Kindle Edition.
"Thou shalt not create graven images, Ira. Thou shalt not take the Lord's name in vain. Still looking at you, Ira. Thou shalt keep holy the Sabbath. You getting this, Ira?"
"What's this 11th commandment - thou shalt not tweet without thinking?"
"I can assure you the content is original."
'Behold, for I have received a text message.'
Biblical Convenience Stores
'It's not so bad. There's only a few rules.'