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"I can't imagine bringing a child into the current art world."
Van Gogh Painting Found in Attic
'He was an impressionist. Like that Alistair McGowan...'
"On some, my right brain says they're good art, but my left brain says there're bad investments. On others, my right brain says they're bad art, but my left brain says they're good investments."
Tags:art, arts, evaluate, evaluates, evaluating, evaluation, evaluations, monetary incentive, monetary incentives, investment, investments, investing, investor, investors, monetary value, value, values, artistic value, artistry, conflict, conflicts, conflicting value, conflicting values, valuation, valuations, art collector, art collectors, connoisseur, connoisseurs, art world, artistic world
Moore; Draped Reclining Mother without Baby.
'It sold for how much!'
"I decided to cut out the pretense and get to the point!"
Tags:artist, artists, artistry, painting, paintings, modern art, modern artist, modern artists, contemporary art, contemporary artist, contemporary artists, expensive, costly, expensive painting, expensive paintings, pricy, art showing, art showings, art gallery, art galleries, art gallery opening, art gallery openings, gallery opening, gallery openings, pretense, pretence, pretentious, pretentiousness, honesty, art business, art world
"The upstairs toilet leaked so we decided to frame it and call it a Gerhard Richter."
'I hope that's all your own work, Spot.'
'Bacon? It's more like squashed sausages!'
Turner Prize winner: 'A Waste of Space'
'I don't remember seeing that in the brochure.'
The future Pablo Picasso about to be conceived
'Oh just ignore him; he likes to think he's a conceptual artist.'
'Then I thought, something like this might look great on coasters, phone pads, jotters, that kind of thing, , ,'
Sorry, I've said all I can say in this medium.
'I've always wanted to enter the Turner Prize.' - 'Burp!' - 'Okay, great. Now I just need a title...'
'I'm really a painter and decorator - I only do this to pay the bills.'
'I think you'll find that the humour of this piece, rests largely in this small blue section here.'
How minimalism was born.