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"It's photo of a black hole."
"I said I'm an astronomer, not an astrologist!"
Tags:astrologist, astrologists, astrology, astronomer, astronomers, astronomy, astrophysics, astrophysicist, astrophysicists, stargazer, stargazers, star-gazer, star-gazers, starsign, starsigns, star sign, star signs, pseudoscience, pseudosciences, pet peeve, pet peeves, hobby, job title, job titles, con, cons, scientist, scientists, psychic, psychics, fortune teller, fortune tellers, fortune, fortunes, horoscope, horoscopes
"Welcome to the Cirque du Soleil!"
The Big Tipper
Tags:space, outer space, science, star, stars, constellation, constellations, big dipper, astronomy, astronomer, astronomers, astrology, astrologer, astrologers, service, customer service, service industry, restaurant, restaurants, bar, bars, tip, tips, tipping, tipping culture, tipper, tippers, big tipper, big tippers, customer, customers, money, word play, wordplay
"Stop complaining. You've got the sun in the mor
"It makes a four star restaurant look pretty damn small and insignificant."
Tags:night sky, the night sky, star gazing, star gazer, star gazers, astronomer, astronomers, astronomy, observatory, observatories, restaurant, four stars, four star rating, four star ratings, pretentious, pretension, pretentiousness, natural beauty, starry night, starry nights, clear night, clear nights, four star restaurant, four star restaurants
"He thought he named a star after me, but it was only a piece of flaming space junk."
"The algorithm isn't showing us as many stars as it used to."
"Man! That's the closest I've been to Earth in 60,000 years and that's about as close as I ever want to get."
Tags:comedian, comedians, comic, comics, comedy act, comedy acts, comedy show, comedy shows, radiation, comic radiation, big bang, breakup, breakups, break up, break ups, break-up, break-ups, girlfriends, boyfriend, boyfriends, breaking up, astronomer, astronomers, astrophysics, astrophysicist, astrophysicists, standup, standups, stand up, stand ups, stand-up, stand-ups
"Yes, I'm sure. It says here the full moon isn't until the twenty-third."
Tags:moon, the moon, full moon, the full moon, astronomy, astronomer, astronomers, conspiracy, conspiracies, conspiracy theory, conspiracy theories, conspiracy theorist, conspiracy theorists, moon cycle, the moon cycle, moon phases, fake, fakes, trick, tricks, fact checking, fact checker, fact checkers, by the book
"Must have cost him a fortune!"
Tags:sponsor, sponsors, corporate sponsor, corporate sponsors, corporate sponsorship, logo, logos, corporate logo, corporate logos, bunny, bunnies, moon, space exploration, space explorer, space explorers, astronaut, astronauts, expensive, marvels, marveling, marvelling, full moon, full moons, astronomy, astronomer, astronomers
"You never really know how boring the sky is till you see it up close."
The end of the solar system
Tags:solar system, sun, suns, planet, planets, astronomy, astronomer, astronomers, science, sciences, astro-physics, science nerd, science nerds, dinners ready, mom, moms, mum, mums, mother, mothers, teenager, teen, teens, parenting, parent, parents, parenthood, end, end of the world, endings, death, dying sun, orbit, out of orbit, red giant, red giants, planetary system, planetary systems, sun, son, suns, sons, pun, puns, wordplay, play on words
'I hope my grandma doesn't find out the world doesn't revolve around me.'
Sunrise, Sunset, Noon Trail Signs
Ned and Bobby Tilson discover a dwarf planet in their attic.
Tags:planet, planets, new planet, new planets, dwarf, dwarfs, dwarf planet, dwarf planets, small planet, small planets, discover, discovers, discovery, discoveries, astronomy, astronomers, attic, attics, store, storage, find, finds, finding, unexpected, hidden, scientific, scientific discovery, scientific discoveries, cosmology, cosmologist, cosmologists
After the death of New York City, Zeus placed it in the heavens as a constellation.
Tags:new york, ny, urban, city, cities, constellation, constellations, star, stars, space, outer space, astronomy, astronomer, astronomers, astrology, astrologist, astrologists, science, zeus, greek, greek god, greek gods, greek mythology, myth, myths, legend, legends, history, historical, heaven, heavens, death, dead, borough, boroughs, five boroughs, manhattan, brooklyn, queens, the bronx, staten island, map, maps, outline, outlines, new, modern, modern life
Omar Khayyam Meets Trader Joe
Tags:omar khayyam, supermarket, supermarkets, astronomer, astronomers, mathematician, mathematicians, poet, poets, poetry, health food, health food store, health food stores, grocery store, grocery stores, indecision, indecisive, retailer, retailers, grocer, grocers, great mind, great minds, overwhelmed, overwhelming
"The first time we see the sun in months, and it explodes."
Tags:apocalypse, apocalyptic, sun, end times, doomsday, explosion, big bang, bad weather, solar flare, doomsday, british weather, english weather, weather, bad weather, small talk, changeable weather, holiday, vacation, holidays, vacations, get away, typical, murphy's law, murphys law, sod's law, sods law, global warming, supernova, astronomy, astronomer, astronomers
"It finally happened. Someone named a planet 'Butthole'."
'Here's mine, water dominates, dress warm as you enter a chilly phrase...'
Tags:sea, seas, ocean, oceans, titanic, ship, ships, boat, boats, unsinkable, iceberg, icebergs, atlantic, shipwreck, shipwrecks, passanger, passangers, disaster, disasters, lifeboat, lifeboats, astrony, astronomer, astronomers, drowing, drown, drowns, drowned, horoscope, horoscopes, the argyle sweater, argyle sweater
'Oh, for Pete's sake! Will you tell Milligan that it's HIS turn to clean the bird doo off of the telescope lens?!'
'Mars is known as the 'red planet'? Does it have debt problem like ours?'
'My mind was a million miles away today, but that wasn't far enough.'