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Attention Span Remaining: 3 minutes, 27 seconds.
A good speech is always shorter than you audience's attention span.
'I don't know whether the fish oils have helped his concentration but they've certainly helped keep the fly population down.'
'How can he have an attention deficit when he has so many nice things to hold his attention?'
Man pumping 'Ritlain' into a Child Behaviour Clinic,
"Your husband suffers from SADD. Spousal Attention Deficit Disorder."
'I'm afraid your daughter isn't paying attention in class.'
"I wish I knew. We've been working on it for years, but every time we think we're finished, the designers tell us it has to be shorter!"
"As it says in Matthew 26-40, 'So, you had not the strength to stay awake with me ONE hour?'"
Paul exhibits a classic symptom of Attention-Surplus Disorder.
"I don't think it's ADD. It's perfectlt normal for your son to be distracted by squirrels."
"I wasn't paying attention in school and accidentally became an attorney."
'It appears that your son's problems stem from attention deficit disorder.'
'He said he wanted to consult you about his attention span problem, and then he wandered away.'
'I'm afraid your son has a very short attention span.'
'Your attention-deficit disorder is wonderful. It breaks up your obsessive-compulsive behavior.'
Expert witness in attention-deficit case: 'Sure I'm familiar with...look at this....'
'Oh I'm sorry, I was miles away. Now then you have a what, deficit disorder?'
'It says that you've got a short attention span.'
'I'd like to exchange these cola can tokens for a book on hyperactivity.'
"Why do you watch so much TV? What's the attraction?"
'Mum! What can I do now- I've finished the internet!'
Santa at his office desk. In front of him are three work boxes labeled: Good children, Naughty children, Children with ADHD.