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"Auto reply: I am dead and will have limited access to e-mail."
"Please stay on the line, your call is important to us... imagine how we'd treat you if it weren't."
"Is there an option to make my out-of-office message permanent?"
"You forgot to put your 'out of office' on."
"It's something new I'm trying - I figure it works with my email, so why not in real life?"