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"Oh wow, Countdown to End Times calendar, no, Dean, I don't already have one. Um, Happy New Year to you too."
Tags:calendar, calendars, present, presents, gift, gilfs, bad present, bad presents, bad gift, bad gifts, co-worker, co-workers, colleague, colleagues, weird colleague, weird colleagues, new year, happy new year, new years gift, end times, end of the world, doomsday, doomsdayer, doomsdayers, apocalypse
"For your birthday, I've made a list of annoying tics you might want to take care of."
Tags:birthday, birthdays, happy birthday, birthday gift, birthdays gifts, birthday present, birthday presents, getting old, getting older, ageing, bad gift, bad gifts, insult, insults, tic, tics, annoying, irritating, irritation, bad relationship, bad relationships, marital fight, marital fights, domestic, domestics, domestic argument, domestic arguments, spousal dispute, spousal disputes
Santa Claus gives a toaster to a piece of bread.
"You bought be a toaster for our anniversary? You shouldn't have...seriously, you shouldn't have!"
'Nice iron. Your wife will love it. While I wrap it, you might want to go over to sporting goods and pick out a helmet.'
"Catherine's gift to us tonight is her poetry."
Tags:bad gift, bad idea, bad present, bad gifts, bad ideas, bad presents, writer, writers, author, authors, poet, poets, poetry, poem, poems, book, books, literature, writing, party, parties, gathering, gatherings, get together, friend, friends, couple, couples, boyfriend, boyfriends, girlfriends, interests, hobby, hobbies
"Thank you so much! I'll keep this in my special box of things I can't throw away for fear of hurting someone's feelings."
The art of regifting
Regifts of the Magi
Tags:magi, three kings, three, wisemen, wisemen, wiseman, king, kings, gift, gifts, present, presents, re-gifting, regifting, regift, regifts, re-gifting, re-gifts, wordplay, word play, bad gift, bad gifts, bad present, bad presents, offering, offerings, baby jesus, jesus, nativity, christmas, christmas story, birth of jesus, religion, religious, epiphany
Tags:christmas, christams time, christmas present, christmas presents, present, presents, gift, gifts, christmas gift, christmas gifts, gift giving, gift giver, gift givers, bad gift, bad gifts, bad present, bad presents, novelty, novelties, novelty gift, novelty gifts, novelty present, novelty presents, seasonal gift, seasonal gifts, seasonal present, seasonal presents, last minute, last-minute, last minute gifts, last minute gift
Dear Uncle Drosselmeyer, thanks for the cool nutcracker...
Tags:halloween, trick or treat, trick-or-treat, trick-or-treating, trick or treating, greeting card, greeting cards, kid, kids, costume, costumes, holidays, bad treat, bad treats, bad gift, bad gifts, unwanted candy, unwanted candies, halloween candy, halloween candies, greeting card, greeting cards
"Then maybe you should just tell me what you want for your birthday instead of saying you don't care."
"Our anniversary! You remembered!"
Tags:animal, animals, pet, pets, pet owner, pet owners, cat, cats, feline, felines, cat owner, cat owners, cat lady, cat ladies, mouse, mice, anniversary, anniversaries, present, presents, gift, gifts, relationship, relationships, single, couple, couples, bad gift, bad gifts, bad present, bad presents
And then, exactly one month later, re-gifting was invented.
'Another stupid ball of string. I was hoping for a tablet."
Tags:gift, gifts, bad gift, bad gifts, unwanted gift, unwanted gifts, string, ball of string, balls of string, cat, cats, feline, felines, ball, regift, regifts, regifting, tablet, tablets, cheap gift, cheap gifts, wish list, wish lists, wishlist, wishlists, christmas gift, christmas gifts, christmas list, christmas lists
"It's another recipe for fish."
Tags:desert island, desert islands, marooned, castaway, castaways, stranded, abandoned, message in a bottle, seafood, fish, monotony, monotonous, survival, recipe, recipes, useless, uselessness, unhelpful, unhelpfulness, pointless, pointlessness, ungrateful, seafood recipe, seafood recipes, bad gift, bad gifts, bad present, bad presents
Weight loss manual.
"An alarm clock?! Wow... What have I done to make you hate me so much, Louise?"
"My girlfriend got it for me. What? It's not so bad is it? Is it?..."
Tags:angler fish, angler fishes, angler-fish, angler-fishes, anglerfish, anglerfishes, lamp shade, lamp shades, lamps, shades, lamp, shade, deep, water, ocean, sea, lantern, fish, bioluminescence, bioluminescent, lampshade, light, girlfriends, boyfriend, boyfriends, bad gift, bad present, bad gifts, bad presents
When you buy Abuelita Zoraida a coffee press...you're really giving her...a nice pot."
"Let me guess...these are the purple bunny slippers Tia Fela gave us last year."
Tags:baldo, regift, regifts, regifting, re-gift, re-gifts, re-gifting, christmas gift, christmas gifts, xmas, x-mas, christmas, slippers, bunny slippers, bad gift, bad gifts, bad present, bad presents, present exchange, present exchanges, exchange, exchanges, exchanging, unwanted gift, unwanted gifts, holiday season
"I was thinking about giving Estella this diecast
Tags:baldo, lowrider, lowriders, valentine, valentines, valentine's day, valentine's day gift, valentine's day gifts, gift idea, gift ideas, selfish, self-interest, self-interested, bad gift, bad gifts, car lover, car lovers, gearhead, gearheads, convertible, model car, model cars, mistake, mistakes, amateur mistake, amateur mistakes, fatherly advice
"Baldo, Valentine's Day is all about flowers."
Tags:baldo, valentine's day gift, valentines day gift, valentine's day gifts, self-interested, selfish, car part, car parts, male interest, male interests, valentine, valentines, valentine's, valentine's day, valentines day, steering wheel, steering wheels, car lover, car lovers, gearhead, gearheads, bad present, bad presents, bad gift, bad gifts, doghouse, doghouses, put in the doghouse, fatherly advice
You mean you thought I'd actually like this piece of tat?