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Dad's old fashioned barbeque
'This summer, spoil yourself silly with a...Pocket Barbecue!'
Tags:barbecue, barbecues, bbq, bbqs, barbeque, barbeques, spoil yourself, spoiling yourself, treat yourself, treating yourself, consumer, consumers, consumerism, grill, grills, grilling, grilled, useless invention, useless inventions, invention, inventions, inventor, inventors, retailer, retailers, junk, worthless
"The wings are addictive."
Don Quixote in the Hamptons
Tags:the ingenious nobleman sir quixote of la mancha, don quixote, hamptons, chasing windmill, chasing windmills, el ingenioso hidalgo don quijote de la mancha, miguel de cervantes, literary figure, literary figures, literary character, literary characters, chivalry, romance, romances, romantic, romantics, bbq, bbqs, barbecue, barbecues, barbeque, barbeques, joust, jousts, jousting, holiday home, holiday homes, vacation home, vacation homes
The King Can Do No Wrong
Tags:barbecue, barbecues, bbq, bbqs, barbeque, barbeques, king, kings, royal, royals royalty, self important, self importance, self-importance, self-important, modern life, modern time, modern attitudes, bbq ritual, bbq rituals, summer, summertime, summer holiday, summer holidays, summer vacation, summer vacations, weekend, weekends, the weekend
"Summer's here. Do you want to start talking incessantly about tomatoes or corn?"
Tags:season, seasons, summer, summertime, food, vegetable, vegetables, veggies, tomato, tomatoes, corn, corn on the cob, corn-on-the-cob, talking, discussing, speaking, conversing, topic, topics, theme, themes, fresh, local, produce, incessantly, endlessly, ceaselessly, never stops talking, agriculture, farm, farms, farming, farmer, farmers, market, markets, chef, chefs, cook, cooks, barbecue, barbecues, barbeque, barbeques
"We suburb, son; therefore, we grill."
Tags:fathers and sons, bbq, bbqs, barbecue, barbecues, barbeque, barbeques, suburbs, suburban life, the suburbs, suburbia, middle class, middle classes, the middle class, i think therefore i am, cogito ergo sum, rené descartes, descartes, je pense, donc je suis, modern life, modern times, modern attitudes, middle age, middle-aged, middle aged, dad, dads, masculinity
"I take it this means the barbeque is ready."
Tags:barbecue, barbecues, barbeque, barbeques, gender issues, bbq, bbqs, middle age, middle aged, mid life crisis, mid-life crisis, suburban life, suburb, suburbs, suburbia, middle class, middle classes, hyper masculine, hyper masculinity, toxic masculinity, loin cloth, loin cloths, neanderthal, neanderthals, cave men, cave man, cavemen, caveman, cave dweller, cave dwellers, ancient history, stone age, the stone age, early man, primitive man
Tags:barbecue, barbecues, barbecuing, barbequing, barbeque, barbeques, cookout, cookouts, cooking, grilling, grill, grills, food, hamburger, hamburgers, burger, burgers, man, men, summer, summertime, sunup, sunrise, losing track of time, crazy, obsessed, obsession, obsessions, addict, addicts, addiction, addicted
'I've been grilling him for hours and he hasn't even started to sizzle!'
"They make an awfully big thing of cookouts."
"Please hug me."
"Don't be intimidated. He doesn't even have a balcony."
"The kids? They're great! Karen got retweeted by a famous YouTuber and Timmy just hit 16K Insta followers. They start influencing so quickly, don't they?"
Tags:father, fathers, fatherhood, parent, parents, parenthood, parenting, modern parenting, proud parent, proud parents, kid, kids, children, child, childhood, modern childhood, social media, influencer, influencers, follower, followers, following, barbeque, barbeques, cookout, bragging, brag, brags
"I heard you had a little problem with the law."
Tags:white collar crime, white collar crimes, law, laws, law and order, problem, problems, issue, issues, dilemma, dilemmas, breaking the law, non-violent, financially motivated, financial crime, money, fraud, forgery, identity theft, embezzlement, money laundering, cookout, cookouts, barbecue, barbecues, barbeque, barbeques, bbq, gathering, get together, friend, friends, gossip, gossiping, gossiper, gossipers
"We'd cook out more often if it weren't for these damned monitor lizards!"
"Hey, everybody, we're invited to a cookout!"
"I know you love to bar-b-que, honey....but you just can't barbeque spaghetti!"
'Just think. . . future generations of Americans will observe July 4 in an orgy of fireworks, beer and barbeque. . .'
"Go ahead, finish your beer."
Tags:heaven, gates of heaven, pearly gates, pearl gates, the pearly gates, st peter, st. peter, saint peter, pig, pigs, bbq, bbqs, barbecue, barbecues, barbeques, barbeque, judgement, judgement day, dying, after life, the afterlife, afterlife, the after life, meat eater, meat eaters, omnivore, omnivores
"Use a bit too much lighter fluid, honey?"
'Hold on a second there fellas! I know how this must look.'
"It's only the Ericksons, so why don't you just use the recalled hamburger meat."
Tags:food, cookout, cookouts, barbecue, barbecues, barbecuing, barbequing, barbeque, barbeques, hamburger, hamburgers, burger, burgers, beef, ground beef, chuck, mince, dining, eating, cooking, recalled, recall, recalls, patty, pattie, patties, meat, ethics, unethical, relationship, relationships, contamination, e. coli, food poisoning, food safety, health inspector, health inspectors, food recall, food recalls
'What p***es me off the most about all this is that I used to enjoy church barbecues...'
'It's our newest cremation model. Tank sold separately.'