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"Quick, Jerry! A drink for Ted. He tried to put a penny in an old man's hat."
"Don't mind me, Riche – it's just the rabies talking."
"Put that out! It's over. And lose the goatee."
"It's just the usual Wednesday crowd."
Tags:wednesday, wednesdays, regular, regulars, customer, customers, client, clients, usual crowd, usual crowds, camel, camels, hunchback, hunchbacks, barmen, barman, landlord, landlords, bartender, bartenders, bar-tender, bar-tenders, bartending, drink, drinks, drinking companion, drinking companions
Businessman at a bar mad to look like desk. Bartender says: 'The usual, Mr. B?'
"Stop me if you heard this one."
"A slurry of radioactive high-sulphur antibiotic-resistant carbon, please."
Tags:pollution, pollutions, polluted, pollute, pollutes, slurry, slurries, radioactive slurry, radioactive slurries, radioactive, radioactivity, hazardous waste, waste, waste pipe, waste pipes, pipe, pipes, drain, drains, sewer, sewers, sewer system, sewer systems, pub, pubs, bar, bars, bartender, bartenders, barman, barmen
"Impossible as it may seem, Fred, the fate of the world depends on this drink and six or seven more just like it."
"I don't want stock options. I want you to pay your tab."
"If it's the reedy, gurgling 'cut-cut-turrrrr' of the long-billed marsh wren, I'm not here."
Tags:bar, bars, pub, pubs, bartender, bartender, barman, barmen, avoiding calls, dodging calls, bird, birds, wren, wrens, marsh wren, bird watcher, bird watchers, bird calls, bird call, bird song, i'm not here, avoid, avoiding, avoids, relationship difficulties, relationship, relationships, marital difficulties, marriage, marriages
"Oh, God, now they'll all start."
Tags:herd, herds, herd mentality, her mentalities, pack, packs, pack mentality, pack mentalities, howl, howls, howling, wolf, wolves, wild dog, wild dogs, dog, dogs, sing, sings, singing, pub, pubs, bar, bars, barman, barmen, barkeeper, barkeepers, nuisance, nuisances, racket, rackets, noisy, off-key, singalong, singalongs, annoyance, annoyances, drunk, drunks, drunken, drunkard, drunkards
"Joe, the beautiful people are back from their summer places. Would you mind not coming in anymore?"
'What do you mean you're out of ice?'
"It's the loony bin. They want to know if you're coming back."
Tags:loony bin, loony bins, insane asylum, insane asylums, mental asylum, mental asylums, mental patient, mental patients, asylum, asylums, drinker, drinkers, drunk, drunks, drinking problem, drinking problems, alcohol problem, alcohol problems, landlord, landlords, barmen, barman, telephone, telephones, publican, publicans, politically incorrect, political incorrectness
"Grasshoppers all around."
"Vodka on the rocks, in the rocks, around the rocks, and under the rocks."
"You're cut out for this job."
"Call the organ bank and tell them that we're ready for tonight's pickup!"
"No shoes, no shirt, no pants, no service."
'I could really use a stiff belt.'
'I wanted this on the rocks.'
Tags:ice, ices, on the rocks, rocks, rock, rocky, goat, goats, mountain goat, mountain goats, drink, drinks, complain, complaint, complains, complaining, complainer, complainers, mountain, mountains, habit, habits, neat, barman, barmen, waiter, waiters, customer service, the flying mccoys, flying mccoys
"Ever since the sniper I change barstools every few beers."
Tags:barstool, barstools, bar stool, bar stools, bar-stool, bar-stools, sniper, snipers, sniping, sniper rifle, sniper rifles, shooting, shootings, shoot, shoots, gun crime, gun crimes, barmen, drinker, drinkers, pub, pubs, beer, beers, target, targets, pint, pints, victim, victims, easy target, easy targets, paranoid, paranoia, paranoias, novel, novels, book, books, liam o'flaherty
'When's happy hour?'
"Anyone here named Hippity?"