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'You, bearded lady. I ain't paying you to loaf around - oh sorry, I thought you were someone else... well, have a nice day.'
Tags:gender, genders, gender-neutral, gender spectrum, gender neutral, fairy tale, fairy tales, fairy-tale, fairy-tales, retelling, retell, parody, parodied, parodies, rapunzel, hair, female, male, gender identity, beard, beards, facial hair, twist, new twist, fresh, fresh twist, gender stereotypes, gender stereotype, princess, damsel, damsels, damsel in distress, heteronormative, hetero normative, hetero-normative
"Put that out! It's over. And lose the goatee."
'He's a goatee herder.'
'Movember is over...I want it off!'
"Same goash-darn thing every full moon, eh, Mr. Harper?"
Tags:barber, barbers, barbershop, barbershops, hair salon, hair salons, hairdresser, hairdressers, salon, salons, beauty salon, beauty salons, hairstylist, hairstylists, hair, hairy, fur, furry, shave, shaving, shaving cream, werewolf, werewolves, full moon, monster, monsters, creature, creatures, myth, myths, legend, legends, recurring problem, recurring problems, facial hair, beard, beards, halloween
"The rest of the flock and I feel you're displaying a lack of sensitivity with those 'muttonchops'."
Tags:animal, animals, talking animal, talking animals, sheep, flock, flocks, shepherd, livestock, farm, farms, shepherds, mutton, muttonchop, muttonchops, mutton chop, mutton chops, hair, facial hair, sideburn, sideburns, beard, beards, disrespectful, insensitive, indifferent, man, men, wordplay, word play
"Call the boat, the beards are ready."
"I've made a terrible mistake."
"Good beard."..."Nice beard."..."Good beard."..."Great beard."..."Good beard."
Tags:hockey, hockey players, hockey player, hockey teams, hockey game, sports, sport players, sport teams, athlete, athletes, athletics, sportsmanship, team members, compliment, compliments, complimenting, friendly, courtesy, courteous, handshake, handshakes, handshake line, handshake lines, playoff, playoffs, sporting tradition, sporting traditions, beard, beards, bearded, facial hair, assimilation, men complimenting each other, men complimenting
"You're not a goat person?"
"Real men don't shave, but, if you have to, don't be dainty about it."
Official Team Cap With Beard
"It's not supposed to be a beard or a moustache. It's stubble!"
Identical bearded cavemen.
"It's a soul patch, but luckily we've caught it early."
Tags:soul patch, soul patches, facial hair, beard, beards, hair, out of style, not stylish, jazz dot, uncool, out of date, fashion, fashion police, diagnose, diagnosis, doctor, doctors, nurse, nurses, medical, medical professionals, medical professional, hospital, hospitals, medical center, medical centers, medical centre, medical centres, doctor's office, doctor's offices, patient, patients, evaluation, trendy, trend setting, fashionable
Tags:music, musician, musicians, rock, famous musician, famous musicians, rock star, rock stars, police, policeman, policemen, police officer, police officers, cop, cops, traffic stop, traffic stops, traffic ticket, traffic tickets, fine, fines, fashion, style, personal appearance, fashion statement, beard, beards, facial hair, sunglasses, word play, wordplay, play on words
Shaving off your Beard
Tags:beard, beards, shave, shaving, chin, chins, big chin, big chins, shaving foam, hipster, hipsters, unexpected, disguise, disguises, disguised, disguising, long face, long face, stubble, hairstyle, hairstyles, fashions, trend, trends, following trends, moustache, moustaches, mens fashion, mens fashions, men's fashion, men's fashions
"I'm growing it for a movie I'm producing."
Tags:beard, beards, stubble, designer stubble, five oclock shadow, pretentious, pretension, pretentiousness, vain, vanity, the rugged look, film industry, movie industry, hollywood, producer, producers, film producer, film producers, movie producer, movie producers, chat up, chat up line, chat up lines, conceit, conceited, actor, actors, acting
Dad on the History Channel.
The Beard in the Stone
"The congregation wants you to know we think you have a very nice speaking voice..."
At the local beards anon meeting
Baseball team emerging from hibernation