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"Shaving your head takes the guesswork out of going bald."
"A word to the wise- never put on mascara when you're drunk."
"You should go sit out in the sun. Get some color. You'd look good with a tan. And a cigarette. I think you'd look really good with a tan and a cigarette."
'White chocolate, so you can't see the chocolate in the corners of our mouths. . . it's an old beauty trick.'
"Take it from me...you've got to exfoliate."
'Be honest, does my hair look mousy?'
"Eternally youthful complexion? Here's the deal. Never go out in the sun. Never eat dessert. And, for God's sake, don't smile."
"What I'm looking for is a ten minute total makeover that doesn't change the essential me!"
"I'm on the Mediterranean diet."
'We're the same age, but you look great! What's your secret?'
May's guide to looking cheap on a budget.
Flo didn't know what was odder: the beauty tip that hemorrhoid cream reduces bags under the eyes or that she actually tried this beauty tip.
Fred didn't know what was odder: his wife's beauty tip that hemorrhoid cream reduces bags under the eyes or that he actually tried the tip.
'I'd love to take a bath in milk. . . No, up to my neck.'
Toilet roll beauty tips.
"Beauty comes from within."