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'And now, for the big surprise.'
'And to my no good nephew Milo, who thought he was going to get all my cash - lots of luck!'
'...Mom said i can have it!' 'No way! She promised I get the painting!'
In my will, I leave my credit cards to my wife.
'The good news is that you've inherited something from your father. The bad news is, it's his huge nose.'
'And, to my ne'er-do-well nephew who thinks that money grows on trees, I leave the big maple out in front of my house.'