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The Free Range Finch
A bird looks at itself in the mirror with binoculars.
"I put the bird to bed - let's party."
Tags:married life, married couple, love life, love-life, party, parties, husband, husbands, wife, wives, bird, birds, birdcage, birdcages, bird cage, bird cages, bird-cage, bird-cages, parrot, parrots, budgie, budgies, bedtime, bedtimes, bedtime ritual, bedtime rituals, parenthood, parenting, parent, parents
"There goes our attorney, headed for Florida."
Tags:bird, birds, pet, pets, pet bird, pet birds, birdcage, birdcages, bird cage, bird cages, migrate, migration, migrations, migrating, fly south, flying south, birds flying south, attorney, attorneys, lawyer, lawyers, florida, winter, winters, wintertime, wintertimes, prison, prisons, prisoners, crimes, criminal, criminals, locked up, abandon, abandoned, jail, jails, in jail, abandonment, unsupported, anthropomorphism, anthropomorphic
"They stopped the paper."
"The fools don't realize that what I do is political commentary."
Tags:parrot, parrots, bird, birds, immitate, immitates, immitating, immitation, voice, voices, bird cage, bird cages, birdcage, birdcages, fool, fools, owner, owners, commentary, political, political commentary, talent, talents, talented, role, roles, ability, abilities, unappreciated, unrecognise, unrecognised, politics, family, families, argument, arguments, family issues, speak, speaks, speaking, pet, pets, owner, owners
"Seven, eight, nine, ten..."
Tags:bird, birds, birdcage, birdcages, bird cage, bird cages, prison, prisons, jail, jails, imprisoned, imprison, prisoner, prisoners, jail cell, jail cells, parrot, parrots, pet bird, pet birds, pet, pets, pet owner, pet owners, work-out, work out, pull-up, pull-ups, passing time, cage, caged, cages
'I read my newspaper online.'
"I had that dream again where someone is reading me, then the next thing I know, I'm lining the bottom of a bird cage."
Tags:tree, trees, fear, fears, fearful, scare, scares, scary story, scary stories, nightmare, nightmares, newspaper, newspapers, newspaper lining, newspaper linings, birdcage, birdcages, bird cage, bird cages, dream, dreams, dream interpretation, dream interpretations, dream analysis, dream analyses, read, reads, reading, reader, readers, paper
"I hope you didn't pay too much for that parrot. It hasn't said a word!"
Tags:parrot, parrots, talk, talks, talking, talker, talkers, married couples, couple, couples, married couple, talking parrot, bird, cage, patience, chance, birdcage, birdcages, bird cage, bird cages, talk over, talks over, talking over, chatter, chatters, chatting, jabber, jabbers, constant, constantly, talkative, chattering
'Whoever said 'Free As A Bird' didn't know a thing.'
"We need to line the bird cage. Bring me the holiday newsletters."
'I'm worried about Joe. He's chirping to himself again.'
'How many times must I tell you? - Don't feed my vitamin pills to the bird!'
"She left him for a two-legged pirate!"
Tags:parrot, parrots, infidelity, unfaithfulness, bird, birds, birds of paradise, bird of paradise, pet, pets, pirate, pirates, pirate captain, pirate captains, piracy, privateer, privateers, buccaneer, buccaneers, adulterer, adulterers, gossip, gossips, gossiper, gossipers, gossiping, bird cage, bird cages, birdcage, birdcages-
"Ever notice the older you get the more you stop repeating yourself."
"I'm hoping to be out on parole soon."
'Hey, not on the obituaries! Show some respect!'
""Lets get a picture of the both of us."
"Well, this is pretty embarrassing."
Tags:embarrassing, embarrassment, embarrassments, birdcage, birdcages, bird cage, bird cages, bird-cage, bird-cages, budgie, budgies, fly tape, fly-tape, flytapes, fly-tapes, fly tapes, embarrassed, bird, birds, pet, pets, pet bird, pet birds, humiliation, humiliations, humiliated, escape, escapes, escaping
'Man, you totally passed out last night, so we marked on your head.'
Tags:parrot, parrots, birdcage, birdcages, bird cage, bird cages, bird-cage, bird-cages, birds of paradise, pet, pets, pet bird, pet birds, pet parrot, pet parrots, bird poo, bird poos, bird poop, bird poops, prank, pranks, prankster, pranksters, drunken, antic, antics, joke, jokes, joker, jokers, joking
'He's all chirp and no peck.'
'I wood go back to perching - not planking.'
'I'm trying to read and you keep covering it up!'