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"I've had my teeth whitened my vision corrected, my face tightened and my hair implanted. Now I'd like to have my birth certificate changed."
Tags:longing younger, ageing, looking young, getting old, getting older, vain, vanity, dob, date of birth, birth certificate, birth certificate, false identity, new identity, new identities, teeth whitening, cosmetic surgery, plastic surgery, hair loss, losing hair, going bald, alopecia, rich person, rich people, the one percent, the 1 percent, wealth divide, wealth gap
"Human Resources wants to know if you still wish to identify with the gender on your birth certificate."
"You know, I've never actually seen your birth certificate."
Tags:obama, barack, birth certificate, birth certificates, birth certificate conspiracy, conspiracy theory, donald, trump, president, presidents, political, political leaders, political leader, government, governments, citizen, citizenship, citizens, birth rights, birth right, immigrant, immigrants, immigration, husband, wife, husbands, wives, marriage, married, marry, relationship, relationships, spouse, spouses, russian, suspicious, suspicious wife
'My dog ate my homework and my birth certificate!'
'Bring your birth certificate when you pick me up - My Dad will want to see it.'
"Billy to base. I found the motherload, but I don't think the sunshine will penetrate this deep."
Tags:obama, barack obama, president obama, sunshine law, sunshine laws, sunshine, best disinfectant, secret, secretive, secrets, acorn, birther, birthers, birth records, birth record, birth certificate, birth certificates, scandal, scandals, fast and furious, college record, college records, college grades, benghazi, hell
'No, it's not my diploma. I dropped out. It's my birth certificate.'
GOP chooses between a bottle of 'Fake Birth Certificate' and a drug of 'He's a Muslim'.
'That's birth certificate fraud!'
'I asked to see your birth certificate. This is your death certificate.'
'We've uncovered your birth certificate,'
Where's This Kid's Birth Certificate?
"Did you bring our birth certificates, photo ID, passport and citizen papers?"
'Gov. Romney, show us the worth certificate!'
'We will concede, the president ws born in Hawaii! But where as he conceived!?'
'I need 50.1% of the vote, and appreciate the fine people who support me' - Mitt Romney.
'Bring back the Spanish Inquisition! We'll find out soon enough where he was born!'
Post office - Even Pension Day was the same. Dorian, was always asked to produce his birth certificate.
The Wingnut Candy Bar!
'When he was a baby he was so ugly he didn't get a birth certificate, he got an invoice.'
Dumb journalist invents new Obama birther story
'Seriously! These birthers just won't leave me alone!'
'The Donald Trump Side Show'
'Because of your inadequate insurance coverage, your baby arrived C.O.D.'