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Book publisher telling author about some changes needed.
'We won't publish your book 'The Life of a mayfly: An Autobiography' because it's only a page long!'
At last, he was able to plug into the distribution network of a major publisher.
'I figured if you liked the first paragraph I'd go ahead and finish the book.'
'The manuscript is 'green' because it's typed entirely on the backs of rejection slips.'
'Shakespeare's Hamlet word for word - and I who always thought it was a crazy joke.'
'Tonight's lousy TV movie is sponsored by the book publishing industry.'
"Your novel's a bit Stephen King, a bit John Grisham, it's the kind of plagiarism we're looking for."
Publish and be damned