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'I've calculated that we've enough money for 2013 if we cancel February.'
Road to Recovery: Snakes and Ladders.
Budget House of Cards
'. . . What if we sell Britain as an offshore platform to the EU and lease it back from them?'
'Just thinking about it makes my mouth water.'
"Brexit could lead to ARMAGEDDON for the pensions industry..."
'I've just spoken to the Chancellor - we've got to turn it off.'
'You'll find the UK down there!'
'It's odd, I keep cutting it, but it still refuses to get better!'
'OK, it's your turn to stand by the pilot light.'
Brexit and the pound
'Hamish I canna wait for independence, and we control our own banks without any English bailoots!'
'Even you don't take that long to fix something.'
"Can we stop being a hardworking family now?"
Man skates downhill on a pound sign.
'They are new crunchy Osbornes. It says 'Avoid dipping more than twice'!'
'The Europeans say, when the time comes, if we can't afford an EU referendum, they'll chip in...'
"I think the government's taken this give a 'hoodie' a job scheme a step too far."
'Ah, more coverage of the economic recovery - I'm starting to feel the benefit already!'
'Hullo Chancellor. Remember when I was still a little puppy?'
"I'd heard banks were reluctant to give businesses money - but I didn't think it was this bad..."
'I'm the tree surgeon. I've come to prune his magic money tree.'
Foot-in-mouth disease hits Whitehall.
Parliament: Ball park figures beyond this point.