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Yes, Mr Jones, this is the right meeting room for the SWOT analysis.
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"I once had a firm foothold in reality, but I found that it seriously undermined my ability to function as a financial market analyst."
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Steel Works - 'How the devil did all this go down 7 3/8 today?'
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Man and woman speaking in different data chart languages.
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"...and this chart shows people clearly prefer bar graphs to pie charts."
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"After the meeting one of the IT guys said my presentation was 'dope'. Is that good?"
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'Having Analysed the business we think the NHS could save half a billion by sacking all of us...that'll be £250,000.'
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"This is great!! Now, what's the bad news?"
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"My gut tells me the whole business is in flux. Of course, that could just be because I have diarrhea..."
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"A cup fell from the board on your head and you didn't see this coming? Well, I wonder if you're the right man for your job."
'...And our business intelligence system tells you exactly how our business is performing. I find it best not to look!'
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'Sir, I have the live data you requested.'
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Business analysts study current woes of the now miniscule big three . . .
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The consultant's analysis is what we expected. He says go back to basics.
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'What I like about working for Castle.com is the long term stability.'
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"Graph A is verified by Graph B. Graph B is verified by Graph C. Graph C is verified by Graph A. So you see...it's all verified."
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"Anything yet?"
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"I'm impressed by your analysis of the project's failure, Bob...except the part that it's my fault!"
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"Sally and Brad are our Futurists. Stanley back there is our Hindsighter."
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"I can't find anything wrong with your report…keep rewriting it until I can."
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