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"At your opening, I see that you had two glasses of wine, eight pieces of cheddar, eight crackers, and seventeen grapes. That, of course, will have to come off the top of your end."
Tags:art, artwork, artworks, artist, artists, painting, paintings, painter, painters, art gallery, art galleries, gallery, galleries, gallery opening, opening, openings, business, money, finances, nickel and dime, nickel-and-dime, petty, cheap, accountant, accountants, accounting, business expenses, food, drink, drinks, cost, costs, gallery owner, gallery owners
'Can I claim the cost of my nervous breakdown as a business expense?'
Wishing Well: Tax reciept available for business related wishes.
'By proposing a merger instead of marriage, we can deduct this meal as a business expense.'
"It is important to own your feelings. Besides, you can always write them off as a business expense."
'It was the perfect crime, until I deducted my burglar tools as a business expense.'
"What do you mean I can't claim these books on 'tax evasion' as a business expense?"
Travel Advances: '96, 97, 98, 99. . . one dollar.'
Just remember, don't claim for lunch unless I was with you.
"Yes, the biggest goose you can find - take it to the Cratchet's! And get a receipt - it's a legitimate business expense!"
"Just remember, don't claim for lunch unless I was with you."
Tags:expenses, expenses account, expenses accounts, financial director, financial directions, business lunch, business lunches, business expense, business expenses, corporate culture, corporate environment, expenses fraud, white collar crime, white collar crimes, account, accounts, accountancy, bookkeeper, bookkeepers, bookkeeping
"Sorry for the wait. We're a low-overhead crime organization, so when we take someone 'for a ride', we use a ride-sharing service."
"What do you mean, you want more per diem? You can get a burger or 2 tacos for 99 cents!"
'Sorry you can't claim your 60 inch TV as a business expense.'
'That lunch didn't agree with me - it wasn't tax deductable.'
'Give me the bill, it's a business expense.'
'Sticks and stones may break my bones but the billing department is tracing this call.'
'Reinvent yourself. You write off the whole thing as a business expense!'
"The best part is, I get to write it off as a business expense."
'I want to claim this on expenses.'
Benson, we've called you in to discuss your expense account.
"Next time you invite clients for beer and Pizza, make sure it's not a health food brand"
"Look at the inventory! The overhead is killing me! And you're haggling over the price of floor mats!"
Tags:autos, auto dealership, selling cars, inventory, overhead, cost of business, sympathy, buying a car, haggling, auto dealerships, car dealership, car dealerships, overheads, business cost, business costs, business mode, business models, business expense, business expenses, inventories, cash flow, cash-flow, cash-flows, cash flows
"Before I approve your attendance to this conference, ask yourself these 3 questions. First, is this beneficial to our organization? Second, is this beneficial to my professional development? And lastly, does my supervisor give a damn?"
"I drive to work every day. Those are business trips, aren't they?"