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"My, Grandma, what crushing debt you have."
Tags:debt, in debt, debtor, accounting, accountant, accountants, retired, retirement, old age, the elderly, finance, financial management, money management, little red riding hood, red riding hood, fairy story, fairy stories, fairy tale, fairy tales, big bad wolf, the big bad wolf, millennial, millennials, calculate, calculating, accounts book, accounts books, irresponsible, irresponsibility, immature, immaturity
'I'm sorry, does that say $777? It should be $111. I mistakenly calculated your bill in dog dollars.'
'I gotta hand it to you, Conway. It takes a genius like you to figure out how to get an 8-foot-long table through a 3-foot-wide door!'
'Just shoot! You're thinking about it too much!!'
Tags:think, thinks, thinking, thinker, thinkers, too much time, basketball, shoot, shoots, shooter, shooters, angle, angles, math, maths, mathematics, calculate, calculates, calculating, calculated, calculation, calculations, over think, over thinks, over thinking, over thought, in the bleachers, bleachers, in the bleachers
The Life Cycle
Tags:life cycle, life cycles, cycle, cycles, graph, graphs, diagram, diagrams, diagramatic, chart, charts, draw, draws, drawing, calculate, calculating, calculated, born, birth, birthday, birthdays, do stuff, doing stuff, productive, productivity, bell curve, bell curves, die, dies, death, cycle of life, cycles of life
"I was an eight, too, until the number crunchers got hold of me."
Tags:number cruncher, number crunchers, number crunching, accountant, accounting, accountants, bureaucracy, math, maths, mathematics, reduce, reducing, reduced, belittled, belittle, demote, demoted, calculate, calculations, numerical calculation, subtract, subtraction, divide, devision, math teacher, math teachers, maths teacher, maths teachers, financial analyst, financial analysts, statistics, stats, statistician, number cruncher politics
'Eureka! After months of research and formulating algorithms, I've done it... I've discovered the secret to 'being cool'!'
"This year, tax reform has radically changed the federal tables and methods for calculating witholding taxes."
Tags:witholding, witholdings, tax, taxes, tax season, tax seasons, tax day, tax days, tax reform, tax reforms, federal taxes, audit, audits, auditor, auditors, irs, internal revenue service, calculate, calculates, calculating, calculation, calculations, law, laws, change, changes, accountant, accountants, accounting
'You have to think long-term. You can't afford to be old yet.'
'Maybe you should wear a helmet, in case, you know, my math is off.'
Harmon Silas, calculating the thousand words his picture is worth, wonders what do do with contractions.
It was hard to put a price on progress. Real hard without a calculator.
"WWW stands for work, work, work!"
Tags:website, websites, type, types, typing, work out, worked out, revelation, vrevelations, calculate, calculates, calculating, colleague, colleagues, co-worker, co-workers, work, works, working, web address, web addresses, www., work work, work, keyboard, keyboards, encourage, encourages, encouraging, office, offices, office computer, office computers
"After state and federal, you get just one wish, and it's half -off chicken wings."
Tags:accountant, accountants, accounting, finances, finance, financial manager, financial managers, financial adviser, financial advisers, genie, genies, genii, wish, wishes, wished, wishing, state and federal, tax, taxes, taxed, taxing, chicken wing, chicken wings, discount offer, discount offers, offer, offers, shopping, shop, customer, customers, calculation, calculations, calculating, calculates, calculate, financial adviser, financial advisers
'All right, I got a pencil. Now, how do you figure the P/E ratio again?'
"Can you come back? We're still counting carbs."
Tags:restaurant, restaurants, waiter, waiters, waiting on, order, orders, ordering, take an order, deciding, decide, decision, decisions, calculate, calculates, calculations, counting, counts, count, carbs, carbohydrates, diet, diets, dieting, weight loss, losing weight, health, healthy, careful, cautious, cautious of what you eat, calorie, calories, tracking calories, fad diet, fad diets, low carb, low carb diet, low carb diets
'According to this theory, it's strongly improbable that anything should ever happen anytime, anywhere.'
Cat doing complex equation to work out the jump he needs to make.
Tags:equation, equations, formula, formulae, cat, cats, instinct, reason, feline, felines, pet, pets, pet cat, pet cats, mathematician, mathematicians, mathematics, math, maths, geometry, theorem, leap, leaps, angle, angles, jump, jumps, jumping, counter, counters, calculate, calculates, calculating, calculation, calculations, trig, trigonometry, overcomplicate, overcomplicates, overcomplicating, overthink, overthinks, overthinking
"How can an algorithm work out what I want for my birthday, but you still think I want a blender?"
Tags:girlfriend, girlfriends, birthday, birthdays, present, presents, birthday present, birthday presents, boyfriend, boyfriends, work out, working out, calculate, calculates, calculating, algorithm, algorithms, equation, equations, ai, artificial intelligence, blender, blenders, wrong, guess, guesses, incorrect, annoy, annoys, annoyed, irritate, irritates, irritating, irritated
Tags:inchworm, inches, 2.54 centimeters, 2.54 centimetres, centimetre, centimetres, centimetre, centimeters, worm, worms, inch, inches, metric system, french, french people, french person, eurpoeans, eurpoean, invertebrate phyla, measurement, measurements, measure, measures, measured, measuring, calculate, calculated, calculates, calculating, size, sizes, mathematician, mathematician, maths, mathematics, math, teacher, teachers, teach, taught, teaching, teaches
'This is embarrassing. By MY calculations, the universe should have collapsed in on itself last Wednesday.'
'My spreadsheet says we must lighten by 152 pounds.'
"I just couldn't get it to work until I started using alternative facts."
Tags:math, maths, equation, equations, calculate, calculates, calculating, calculation, calculations, maths equation, maths equations, alternative fact, alternative facts, use, uses, using, replace, replaced, replacing, fake, alternative, alternatives, false, wrong, method, methods, alternative method, alternative methods
Do you work out ?
"Ever get the feeling you've crunched the same numbers in a previous corporation?"
Tags:accountant, accountants, office, offices, work, work place, work places, number, numbers, calculation, calculations, calculate, corporation, corporate, corporations, monotony, monotonous, routine, repeat, repetitive, deja vu, coincidence, coincidental, coincidentally, resemble, resemblance, resembling, similarity, crunching numbers, crunch numbers