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"My, Grandma, what crushing debt you have."
Tags:debt, in debt, debtor, accounting, accountant, accountants, retired, retirement, old age, the elderly, finance, financial management, money management, little red riding hood, red riding hood, fairy story, fairy stories, fairy tale, fairy tales, big bad wolf, the big bad wolf, millennial, millennials, calculate, calculating, accounts book, accounts books, irresponsible, irresponsibility, immature, immaturity
"I love how you play them against each other."
Tags:animal, animals, talking animal, talking animals, talking pet, talking pets, pet, pets, pet owner, pet owners, talking cat, talking cats, cat, cats, cat owner, cat owners, manipulative, sly, sneaky, calculating, scheming, play them, against, mexican standoff, mexican standoffs, mexican stand-off, mexican stand-offs, no winner, no winners, weapon, weapons, gun, guns, firearm, firearms, gun violence, threat, threats, threatening
'Just shoot! You're thinking about it too much!!'
Tags:think, thinks, thinking, thinker, thinkers, too much time, basketball, shoot, shoots, shooter, shooters, angle, angles, math, maths, mathematics, calculate, calculates, calculating, calculated, calculation, calculations, over think, over thinks, over thinking, over thought, in the bleachers, bleachers, in the bleachers
The Life Cycle
Tags:life cycle, life cycles, cycle, cycles, graph, graphs, diagram, diagrams, diagramatic, chart, charts, draw, draws, drawing, calculate, calculating, calculated, born, birth, birthday, birthdays, do stuff, doing stuff, productive, productivity, bell curve, bell curves, die, dies, death, cycle of life, cycles of life
"Our problem is I know your Social Security number but you don't know mine."
"This year, tax reform has radically changed the federal tables and methods for calculating witholding taxes."
Tags:witholding, witholdings, tax, taxes, tax season, tax seasons, tax day, tax days, tax reform, tax reforms, federal taxes, audit, audits, auditor, auditors, irs, internal revenue service, calculate, calculates, calculating, calculation, calculations, law, laws, change, changes, accountant, accountants, accounting
'How do you divide 17 potatoes between 4 people?'
'Maybe you should wear a helmet, in case, you know, my math is off.'
"After state and federal, you get just one wish, and it's half -off chicken wings."
Tags:accountant, accountants, accounting, finances, finance, financial manager, financial managers, financial adviser, financial advisers, genie, genies, genii, wish, wishes, wished, wishing, state and federal, tax, taxes, taxed, taxing, chicken wing, chicken wings, discount offer, discount offers, offer, offers, shopping, shop, customer, customers, calculation, calculations, calculating, calculates, calculate, financial adviser, financial advisers
"WWW stands for work, work, work!"
Tags:website, websites, type, types, typing, work out, worked out, revelation, vrevelations, calculate, calculates, calculating, colleague, colleagues, co-worker, co-workers, work, works, working, web address, web addresses, www., work work, work, keyboard, keyboards, encourage, encourages, encouraging, office, offices, office computer, office computers
Cat doing complex equation to work out the jump he needs to make.
Tags:equation, equations, formula, formulae, cat, cats, instinct, reason, feline, felines, pet, pets, pet cat, pet cats, mathematician, mathematicians, mathematics, math, maths, geometry, theorem, leap, leaps, angle, angles, jump, jumps, jumping, counter, counters, calculate, calculates, calculating, calculation, calculations, trig, trigonometry, overcomplicate, overcomplicates, overcomplicating, overthink, overthinks, overthinking
"How can an algorithm work out what I want for my birthday, but you still think I want a blender?"
Tags:girlfriend, girlfriends, birthday, birthdays, present, presents, birthday present, birthday presents, boyfriend, boyfriends, work out, working out, calculate, calculates, calculating, algorithm, algorithms, equation, equations, ai, artificial intelligence, blender, blenders, wrong, guess, guesses, incorrect, annoy, annoys, annoyed, irritate, irritates, irritating, irritated
Tags:inchworm, inches, 2.54 centimeters, 2.54 centimetres, centimetre, centimetres, centimetre, centimeters, worm, worms, inch, inches, metric system, french, french people, french person, eurpoeans, eurpoean, invertebrate phyla, measurement, measurements, measure, measures, measured, measuring, calculate, calculated, calculates, calculating, size, sizes, mathematician, mathematician, maths, mathematics, math, teacher, teachers, teach, taught, teaching, teaches
"I know he's little, but he uses it."
Tags:child, children, parent, parents, parenting, tactic, tactics, manipulative, manipulative tactic, manipulative tactics, manipulate, manipulates, manipulating, manipulated, manipulating parents, crying, cry, cries, cried, crocodile tears, lie, lying, cheat, cheating, cheats, cheated, deceive, deceiving, use, using, used, scheme, scheming, calculative, calculating, cunning, crafty, shrewd, devious, conniving, artful, guilt
"It's an excellent proof, but it lacks warmth and feeling."
Tags:mathematician, mathematicians, math teacher, math teachers, math professor, math professors, maths professors, maths teachers, mathematical proof, mathematical proofs, proof, proofs, cold, coldness, calculated, calculating, calculation, calculations, formula, formulas, formulae, mathematical formula, warmth, feeling, feelings, flaw, flaws, flawed
"I just couldn't get it to work until I started using alternative facts."
Tags:math, maths, equation, equations, calculate, calculates, calculating, calculation, calculations, maths equation, maths equations, alternative fact, alternative facts, use, uses, using, replace, replaced, replacing, fake, alternative, alternatives, false, wrong, method, methods, alternative method, alternative methods
"...We're turning off your life support"
"After he gave me the ring, he said I have great long-term potential and a low risk factor."
Tags:sudoku, 666, number, numbers, beast, beasts, devil, devils, armchair, armchairs, rocking, chair, chairs, game, games, trivia, trivial, pitchfork, fork, pitchforks, forks, reading, read, writing, write, writes, solve, solving, solves, solution, solutions, calculating, calculations, the argyle sweater, argyle sweater
"I tread that fine line between being indispensable and maintaining plausible deniability."
'Wow! CEO in just ten days! You ARE a quick study, Perkins!'
...so according to my calculations you owe me...
'Wow, Professor Jones, that's an impressive back-of-the-envelope calculation!'
'84% of our losses are due to accounting errors.'