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Sign at a border crossing saying "Welcome to the U.S.A. - We'll put M&M's in anything!"
Tags:usa, u.s.a., us, u.s., united states, united states of america, america, american, americans, border, borders, border crossing, border crossings, border control, border controls, border security, security, immigration, customs, sign, signs, signage, food, snack, snacks, candy, candies, chocolate, chocolates, welcome to, sweet tooth, unhealthy food, unhealthy foods, big eater, big eaters
'My secret? Stay away from Halloween candy.'
"I have fun-size kale bars for those using recyclable bags."
Tags:kale, health, health food, health foods, healthy food, health foods, recycle, recycles, recycling, reward, rewards, rewarding, hippy, hippies, halloween, candy, candies, candy bar, candy bars, health nut, health nuts, gross, environmentalist, environmentalists, environmentalism, fun size, fun sizes, trick or treat, trick or treats, trick or treating, trick or treater, trick or treaters, disappoint, disappoints, disappointing, disappointment, killjoy, killjoys
"Why not try chocolate? ...and be just like the Pros!"
Tags:trump, donald trump, president donald trump, president trump, trump administration, trump scandal, trump scandals, trump controversy, trump controversies, sweathearts, love hearts, romance, romantic, unromantic, ivanka trump, melania trump, trump sex scandal, trump sex scandals, putin, vladimir putin, putin's puppet, love, loves, candy, candies, sweets, sweet
"Say, Pop, do you realize the average child spends approximately fifteen dollars a year on candy?"
Easter Venn Diagram
"I love the sense of danger that comes with brushing up against childhood obesity."
Tags:fastfood, fast food, child, childhood, children, kid, kids, family, families, health, health and wellbeing, healthy, wellbeing, fitness, physical, fit, fat, fatness, fatter, fats, chips, chip, crisp, crisps, sweet, sweets, candy, candies, obese, obesity, weight loss, weight, weightloss, overweight, over weight, epidemic, obesity epidemic, comment, social commentary
"Uh-oh, the piñata's got the bat now."
The Potato Man
Tags:potato, potatoes, tuber, tubers, ireland, irish, invert, inverted, subvert, subverted, subversion, play on words, word play, word-play, ice cream truck, sweet, sweets, candy, candies, treat, treats, food, foods, snacks, snack, snacking, shop, shopping, vendor, street vendor, street vendors, kid, kids, child, childhood, children, alternate, alternate universe, absurdist
"Ooh, are those Reese's Pieces?"
Tags:reese's pieces, candy, candies, peanut butter, peanut butter lover, peanut butter lovers, guilty, guilty pleasure, guilty pleasure, snack, snacks, snack food, snack foods, sweet tooth, holdup, holdups, hold-up, hold-ups, stickup, stickups, stick-up, stick up, rob, robs, robbing, robbery, robberies, robber, robbers, liquor store, liquor stores, convenience store, convenience stores, bodega, bodegas, impulse buy, impulse buys, distraction, distractions, distracting
"The Stevensons sent over a lovely meat basket."
Tags:gift basket, gift baskets, candy, candies, gift, gifts, present, presents, hamper, hampers, christmas hamper, christmas hampers, stone age, hunt, hunts, hunting, hunter, hunters, meat eater, meat eaters, carnivore, carnivores, carnivorous, cuisine, neighbor, neighbors, neighbour, neighbours, caveman, cavemen, caveman diet, cavemen diets
"Where's your candy."
Tags:seder, seders, passover, passovers, passover seder, judaism, jewish, jews, jew, torah, torahs, candy, candies, chocolate, chocolates, parody, parodying, alternative, holiday, holidays, celebration, celebrates, celebrate, hebrew, feast, feasts, represent, represents, representing, symbol, symbols, symbolism, food, foods, religion, religions, home, family, families, shpasik, jtoons
"I need a box of the gayest chocolate you've got."
Tags:love, loving, romance, romantic, romancing, valentine, valentines, date, dates, dating, loves, loved, boyfriend, boyfriends, husband, husbands, valentine's, valentine's day, gayest, chocolate, chocolates, box of chocolates, celebrating, celebrates, celebration, celebrations, candy, candies, candy, shop, chocolatier, patisserie, pastry, pastries, truffle, truffles, fancy, gift, gifts, present, presents, foodie, foodies, food blog, food blogger, food lover, food lovers, lgbt, lgbtq, lgbtq+
'I gave Amy Tilly a box of candy, and she's going to be my valentine until it's gone.'
'We'll discuss your misbehavior in a moment Billy, but in the meantime, why don't you help yourself to a nice piece of candy?'
"Plain, buttered, or Ramon?"
Tags:popcorn, popcorn machine, popcorn machines, movie theater, movie theatre, cinema, cinemas, plain, buttered, variety, varieties, flavor, flavors, flavoring, flavour, flavours, flavouring, candy, candies, candy stand, candy stands, hygiene, food hygiene, unhygienic, contaminate, contaminates, contaminated
'I'm worried that I might have an S.T.D.. . . I know. . . but I've had sex will all sorts.'
'The candy manufacturers and the dentist agree on one thing. My mouth's commercial.'
"Look Hansel, a house made of broccoli."
Tags:broccoli, temptations, tempting, tempted, rabbit, rabbits, hansel, gretel, fairytale, fairytales, fairy tale, fairy tales, fairy story, fairy stories, rabbit, rabbits, bunny, bunnies, lure, lures, ambush, ambushes, candy, candies, sweet, sweets, vegetable, vegetables, veg, favourite food, favorite food, wicked witch, wicked witches
'Sis, you would have gotten a lot more candy, too, if you'd used these sketchy rubber socks I found in Dad's dresser.'
"Trick or treat, and here's a list of my known food allergies."