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"It's a dead end job. But the cul-de-sac is a nice touch."
Need a little help with your career planning?
"My firm has scrutinised your accounts and determined you could save a fortune by the sacking us...that'll be £300,000 please!"
"When the report said that coaches should have some psychological training I think they meant more than having watched all 11 series of Frasier."
"Taking credit for somebody else's work? Why, Ferguson – that's how I started out."
'Don't worry, you'll grow with the job.'
My brilliant career
Career chart: you are here...you should be here.
'We don't usually negotiate with agents to fill $25,000 a year positions.'
"Henry, I'm beginning to think we're on different career paths."
'We're looking for someone who's comfortable taking risks.'
Planned service changes
Bubble; 'This castle manager job better be for real.'
'Oh yeah, and I was in Boy Scouts.'
Dead End. Now hiring
'This is the last time we post job openings,'
'Why yes, the resume is a very important basis for who we hire.'
'Did I lie on my resume? Absolutely not!'
"I'd love to chat about your wonderful career all afternoon, but the guy who dismissed it with a brief and petulant shrug is on his way to see me about what a great job I did as your mentor."
'Take my word for it, this looks like a good career move.'
'It's just possible that the best candidate is the one who wins the Spoon Race.'
'Ok, so none of those applicants were right, but we got to hire someone for sales.'
'Mr. Handley here makes all the final hiring decisions.'
"My, my, we're just a little overprotective of our proprietary knowledge, aren't we?"
'Yeah, I'm here for the VP of Human Resources job. Why do I have to know anatomy?'