Careers Advisor Cartoons and Comics

"At the moment I'm torn between the emotionally rewarding but poorly resourced role of a social worker or a more intellectualy rigorous career in quantum physics."

'Why did I become an accountant?' Well in truth I just threw a dart at the first page of the dictionary but becoming an aardvark was to difficult

'So, you've no experience, no skills and a poor grasp of reality... Have you considered consulting?'

"So where do you see yourself fitting into late stage capitalism?"

Career Advisor: 'I wish you'd come to me sooner!'

'I'm getting ready to apply to colleges. Do you have a list of party schools?'

Success in a modern business setting requires more than the ability to mime to 'Arctic Monkeys' while blancing a pint of lager on your head.

'Maybe you could refer to your time behind bars as 'living in a gated community'.'

"It's hard to strike just the right balance. I didn't have enough fire in the belly for politics, but I seem to have too much for market research."

"So where do you see yourself in five months?"

'This is the age of specialisation - you can't be a hunter AND a gatherer.'

'I don't wanna discuss my responsibilities! I wanna talk about my rights!'

A backup plan might be a good idea, in case 'being a celebrity' doesn't work out...

"I think you'd make a persuasive salesman."

"You have no scruples whatsoever, and would hack into people's emails, tax returns...have you considered a career as a political advisor?"

'What! You're 7 years old and don't have a life plan yet?'

'No education, no skills, no experience, no character references... I'm afraid the only thing left for you is politics.'

What Harper Lee's REALLY been up to all these years

'The answer is politics. In your manic state you can go out campaigning and in your depressive state you can stay in the office.'

"We realize you do better on your I.Q. tests than you do on anything else, but you just cannot major in I.Q."

'To be honest, as the son of a slave, your career options are quite limited.'

Unglamourous job, but with massive rewards. How about the city?

"Use your head, follow your heart and go with your gut."

The Circle of Life: "Have you considered becoming a careers advisor?"

"Circuses are always looking for bearded ladies..."