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'I've calculated that we've enough money for 2013 if we cancel February.'
'You can't sit like that all the way through the Budget.'
Budget House of Cards
'Our economic forecasts are based on a complicated mathematical formula.' (Hope/Experience).
"Lefties will always complain about any changes to the benefits system...We could cut out the heart, that weights a bit!"
"If we're going to fail to balance the budget again then we have to make sacrifices...and you're OURS!"
"Obviously we'd have loved to help, but there were so MANY other calls on the public purse!"
"The Treasury is fairly sure that the figures in the budget are correct, they might just not be in the right order!"
'I'd prefer the banks were re-formed and Destiny's Child split up.'
'Every year local authorities whinge on about needing more money to maintain services.'
"I've heard Osborne wants Pink Floyd's 'Money' to be the new English anthem."
'We've completed the spending review and there won't be any.'
'I've just spoken to the Chancellor - we've got to turn it off.'
"...Nice handbag, Darling!"
Budget: A penny off a pint!
'Oh dear. That's a bad sign.'
'I think we have got the big budget give away Chancellor, a sure vote winner, 10p off regular size bottles of shampoo for damaged hair.'
'They are new crunchy Osbornes. It says 'Avoid dipping more than twice'!'
"It's for weird minds - they're not wired like mine...oh! I'm a poet and didn't know it!"
'Hullo Chancellor. Remember when I was still a little puppy?'