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"What I'd like, basically, is a temporary line of credit just to tide me over the rest of my life."
"Unfortunately, the urine test counted for half of the grade."
"I see here on your resume you're my daughter's husband."
'The worst part of school is the arithmetic - it's almost impossible to fudge.'
'...I just take the Hide-a-Meter bush, toss it over the meter, and voila! Free unlimited parking!'
'Sorry, two nine year olds are not the same as an eighteen year old.'
'I've always gotten pleasure cheating on my income tax, but the creme de la creme is cheating via electronic filing.'
CITY HALL, 'I don't mind life being a game, but I hate bribing the referee all the time!'
'You picked combination number 3.'
"Just one adult, please."
I am not a robot