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Teacher: 'As an adult you'll probably only use a quarter of what you're taught at school - which brings us to fractions.'
'It's either a boo-boo or an owwie, but the doctors need to run some more tests before they decide.'
'Now that you're 10, we can tell you the truth: beauty isn't actually in the eye of the beholder, there are international standards... and you haven't met them.'
'You know, back when I was a kid, all we needed to have fun was an old tin can... that and a really low standard for what was fun.'
'Hey kid, what are you in for?'
Sticky suit leaf collection system
'Star light, star bright, first star I...' 'No.'
"I don't really know how to tell you this, sweetheart, so I'm just going to come right out and say it: Your goldfish ran away."
"Act your birth order!"
Tags:child, children, baby, babies, kid, kids, sibling, siblings, older sibling, older siblings, younger sibling, younger sibling, older child, older children, younger child, younger children, age, act your age, immature, birth order, family, families, parent, parents, parenting, parenthood, raising a child, raising children, grow up, mother, mothers, mom, moms, mum, mums, motherhood, scold, scolding, tell off, telling off
"'How I Spent My Summer Vacation,' by Lilia Anya, all rights reserved, which includes the right to reproduce this essay or portions thereof in any form whatsoever, including, but not limited to, novel, screenplay, musical, television miniseries, home vid
Tags:copyright, copyrights, rights, intellectual rights, ip, disclaimer, disclaimers, all rights reserved, reproduce, student, students, child, children, kid, kids, presentation, presentations, homework, assignment, assignments, summer, summer vacation, my summer vacation, essay, essays, modern life, education, law, legal, laws, writer, writers
Why Do We Always Want Something Better For Our Children Than What We Had For Ourselves?
Tags:napoleon complex, short, short man, short man syndrome, father, fathers, fatherhood, son, sons, kid, kids, children, height, heights, tall, taller, tallness, self conscious, bitter, sight gag, visual gag, someday, compensate, compensating, compensation, compensates, compensated, expectation, expected, expectations, parenting, parental, parenthood, impossible standards, high standards, impossible, impossible goal, impossible goals, unattainable, unreasonable, unreasonable expectation
"Daddy works in a magical, faraway land called Academia."
Tags:academia, education, research, academics, academic, educator, educators, teacher, teachers, professor, professors, tutor, tutors, doctor, doctors, doctorate, masters, bachelors, university, universities, college, colleges, uni, pretentious, snob, snobby, dad, dads, father, fathers, fatherhood, kid, kids, child, children, childhood, parent, parents, parenthood
"It's her first bench-clearing brawl."
Tags:sport, sports, baseball, player, players, athlete, athletes, team, teams, league, leagues, sports league, sports leagues, little, kid, kids, child, children, parent, parents, parenting, parenthood, mom, moms, mum, mums, mother, mothers, motherhood, father, fathers, fatherhood, dad, dads, family, families, proud parent, proud parents, camera, cameras, video camera, video camera, home video, home videos, home movie, home movies, filming, taping, video taping, fight, fights, fighting, brawl, brawls, brawling, first, cheering, bench, benches, bleacher, bleachers, stand, stands
"I should like to buy a handgun while it is still legal," said Alice very gently.
Tags:alice's adventures in wonderland, book, books, literary, literature, novel, novels, kids, kid, child, children, childhood, kid's book, children's book, lewis carroll, fiction, fictional, gun, guns, gun control, second amendment, right to bear arms, firearm, firearms, handgun, weapon, under the table, gun shop, gun shops, violence, shooting, mass shootings, shootings, school shooting, school shootings
"Where do you get off saying my kid is grade level?"
Tags:education, school, schools, schooling, teaching, teacher, teachers, student, students, classroom, classrooms, class, classes, parent-teacher conference, parent-teacher conferences, parent-teacher interview, parent-teacher interviews, meeting, meetings, kid, kids, child, children, parent, parents, parenting, parenthood, mom, moms, mum, mums, mother, mothers, motherhood, father, fathers, fatherhood, dad, dads, family, families, unsatisfied, dissatisfied, dissatisfaction, upset, angry, grade level, grade levels, marking, grading, mark, marks, grade, grades, primary, elementary, kindergarten, modern education, preschool, nursery school, childcare, daycare, modern life
"My parents are at the age where they're very involved with their own activities."
Tags:kid, kids, child, children, parent, parents, parenting, parenthood, mom, moms, mum, mums, mother, mothers, motherhood, father, fathers, fatherhood, dad, dads, family, families, nanny, nannies, babysitter, babysitters, babysitting, childminder, childminders, childcare, daycare, development, childhood, stages of development, age, ages, activity, activities, date night, date nights, individual, independent, independence
"I thought they introduced the witch a little late."
"I'm trying to remember a happier time.
"Yeah, the sixteenth. Right. Great. And, Dad? Do you think you could cut your hair?"
"Everything's more fun with Muppets!"
Tags:execution, executions, children's show, children's shows, childrens show, childrens shows, kid, kids, audience, audiences, child, children, inappropriate, cute, evil, fun, guillotine, capital punishment, death penalty, dark humor, dark humour, black humor, black humour, lighten up, lightening up, shock, offense, offence
"Your father cut quite a figure jumping the fence into our yard that moonlit night. I never saw him again."
Tags:jump the fence, jumped the fence, deadbeat, deadbeats, deadbeat dad, deadbeat dads, father, fathers, dad, dads, fatherhood, fathering, son, sons, kid, kids, child, children, childhood, family, families, parent, parents, parenting, parenthood, daughter, daughters, mom, moms, mum, mums, mother, mothers, motherhood, mothering, pet, pets, pet owner, pet owners, dog owner, dog owners, dog, dogs, pup, pups, puppy, puppies, animal, animals
"Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will stay with me forever as they sit inside me,getting turned over and over, being blown completely out of proportion."
"You know you've got it right when your parents can't look at you without wincing!"
Tags:adolescent, teens, teen, teenager, rebellion, rebel, rebellious, youth rebellion, trends, trendy, fashion trend, fashion trends, fashion, parents, parent, parenting, child, children, youth, youths, fashionable, high school, high schoolers, middle school, middle schoolers, youth culture, youth cultures, adolescence, adolescence angst, teenage rebellion
"So what if he paid a classmate to do his homework – it was his own allowance."
Tags:parent, parents, mother, mothers, mom, moms, mum, mums, parenting, parenthood, pushy parent, pushy parents, that parent, those parents, child, children, school child, school children, privilege, privileged, wealth, wealthy, cheat, homework, allowance, pocket money, teacher, teachers, teaching, dealing with parents, classmate, classmates