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"How much of a gratuity does Santa usually get?"
"My name is Morris Mandlebaun, I'm 28 years old and I want a tell, blond, blue-eyed shiksa."
Tags:santa, santa claus, father christmas, christmas, christmas time, christmas wish, christmas wishes, mall santa, mall santas, inappropriate, inappropriateness, girlfriends, single, singles, bachelor, bachelors, lonely, loneliness, shiksa, shiksas, white people, white girl, white girls, christmas list, christmas lists, unreasonable request, unreasonable requests, asking too much, unexpected, immature, immaturity, childish, childishness
"No letters to Santa this year. Just tell the tree what you want."
Tags:santa, santa claus, father christmas, letter to santa, santa's letter, letter to father christmas, christmas, christmas tree, christmas trees, virtual assistant, virtual assistants, ai, artificial intelligence, smart speaker, smart speakers, family, families, children, child, christmas list, christmas lists, christmas shopping
"I'm like most people, I guess––a mixture of good and bad."
Tags:santa, santas, father christmas, santa claus, mall santa, mall santas, shopping centre, shopping centres, shopping centers, shopping centers, shopping mall, shopping malls, visit santa, santas grotto, santas grottos, santa's grotto, santa's grotto, naughty list, the naughty list, santas list, santa's list, chistmas, christmas time, christmases, christams season, good and bad, personality, personalities, self aware, self awareness, self-aware, selfaware, child, kid, kids childhood, behaviour, behaving, christmas list, christmas lists
'I'd like some more Depends.'
Santa eats too many mince pies
"Most of what I want this year is listed on the Nasdaq."
Tags:santa, santa claus, father christmas, st. nick, saint nick, st. nicholas, saint nicholas, christmas, xmas, yule, noel, mall santa, shopping mall santa, kid, kids, child, children, precocious, stock market, stock markets, stock, stocks, investor, investors, young investor, young investors, investment, investments, playing the stock market, company, companies, corporation, corporations, money, business, market, markets, economy, stockbroker, stockbrokers, christmas list, christmas lists, intelligent
'Dear Santa, this year I'd like to have some arms because...'
'Well, that's us FINALLY paid off all the bills from Christmas last year.'
"Remember to ask about Santa's needs."
Tags:santa, santa claus, father christmas, santas grotto, child, children, kid, kids, christmas, christmas present, christmas presents, christmas list, christmas lists, reciprocity, manners, good manners, conscientiousness, conscientious, mom, moms, mum, mums, mother, mothers, motherhood, parent, parents, parenting, parenthood
"Truth is, I could never do it all without the miracle of corporate sponsorship."
Cindy had asked Santa for a puppy this Christmas...maybe, just maybe he'd been listening...?
Future beauty pageant contestants' Christmas wish.
"Darling, trust me. Santa isn't going to give you a network."
Tags:santa, santa claus, father christmas, network, networks, networking, christmas list, christmas wish, christmas lists, wish, wishes, hope, hopes, dream, dreams, tv network, tv networks, network channel, network channels, ambitious, ambitiousness, ambition, ambitions, businesswoman, businessperson, businesspeople, head for business, heads for business
"What are your policies regarding the collection and use of children's data?"
"Mr. S. Claus, North Pole. Dear Santa:"
Tags:dictate, dictates, dictating, dictation, dictations, letter, letters, santa, santa claus, father christmas, st. nick, st. nicholas, grown man, adults, adulthood, grown child, grown children, adult child, immature, immaturity, christmas season, letter to santa, letters to santa, wishlist, wishlists, wish list, wish lists, christmas list, christmas lists
Santa No Quid Pro Quo
Tags:trump, donald trump, president donald trump, president trump, trump administration, trump scandal, trump scandals, trump controversy, trump controversies, trump quote, trump quotes, no quid pro quo, ukraine controversy, ukraine, trump impeachment, impeachment, impeach trump, impeach, trump speeches, trump's speech, santa, santa claus, letter to santa, christmas list, christmas lists, father christmas
'Oh, he's jolly enough, but he lacks credibility.'
Santa's list - naughty,nice,nice,naughty,nice...
Dear Santa- Thanks for the awesome gift! p.s. did you know cellphones have built-in calculators? p.p.s. you suck.
"My dad wants me to have all the things he never had, and he never had a pony."
'You weren't very good this year, so instead of that video game system you wanted, you'll be getting an educational toy.'
For kids who ramble on too long about their Christmas lists, store Santas have turned to the Lap-Eject.