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'Do you think we may be holding our new Sunday morning services too early?'
'Nice try, but Disneyland isn't a foreign mission.'
"I've decided to text the sermon to everyone so you will pay attention."
Tags:pastor, pastors, sermon, sermons, vicar, vicars, minister, ministers, priest, priests, church, churches, church sermon, church sermons, congregation, congregations, parishioner, parishioners, attention span, attention spans, communication, communications, text, texts, texting, cellphone, cellphones, cell, cells, mobile, mobiles, phone, phones
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"...and Lord, we thank You for blessing Farmer Finkel with an abundant bean harvest...and thus our new pews."
"Am I going to church?! I thought Christmas got me a pass till Easter."
"10,000 members or not, the Pastor should at least remember my name."
"Last week's sermon about inclusion and diversity seems to have struck a chord."
"The truth is, your church is too hip for us."
Tags:hip, hipster, hipsters, church, churches, preacher, preachers, preaching, vicar, vicars, minister, ministers, fashions, fashionable, church sermon, church sermons, congregation, congregations, parishioner, parishioners, traditionalist, traditionalists, old-fashioned, old fashioned, youth culture, youth cultures
"Great sermon! - When it comes to sin, you sure know what you're talking about!"
"It's bad enough you left your phone on during the church service, but did "Highway to Hell" have to be your ringtone?"
Tags:church, churches, church sermon, church sermons, sermon, sermons, church service, church services, service, services, ringtone, ringtones, mobile, mobiles, cell, cells, phone, phones, congregation, congregations, parishioner, parishioners, embarrassment, embarrassed, embarrassing, public humiliation, public humiliations
"What a day I've had...."
Tags:vicar, vicars, minister, ministers, priest, priests, church, churches, prayer, prayers, praying, bad day, bad days, busy day, busy days, pray, prays, prayed, sermon, sermons, service, services, faith, faiths, faithful, church sermon, church sermons, church service, church services, kneel, kneels, kneeling, job hazard, job hazards
'Would you like seating in snoring or non-snoring?'
'Do you think they're here because they're interested in the topic, or because they think there will be samples?'
Drive-Thru Church Service
'I love his eye contact but I wish he hadn't glanced at me while talking about deadly sins.'
'It will be nice to have the words of my sermon there but it could be distracting to run football scores ... '
All of Rev.Tuttle's sermons are videotaped in case one of congregates runs for public office.
'Oh, oh! They're going to give it to us with both barrels!'
First Church: Today's Sermon: 'Can our Entitlements Be Saved?'
'Dearly beloved.....and the rest of you.....'
How's my sermon. . .
How's my Sermon . . .
'Today's sermon is on the feeding of the five thousand...and I'll be giving you the recipe for that.'
"Haven't you watched the news lately? There's no way to run out of sermon topics anymore!"