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Student in the middle of an exam realises he has accidentally picked up dumb water.
Since college admissions officers might see his Facebook page...
Jim found a way to make some extra cash on days when there was no work.
'Hey, are you like me? Do you hate mowing around trees? ell, then THIS is the machine for you!'
Tags:mow, mows, mowing, mower, mowers, lawnmower, lawnmowers, lawn, lawns, grass, cut, cuts, cutting, cuttings, cutter, cutters, sale, sales, salesman, salesmen, sell, sells, selling, tree, trees, convenient, convenience, machine, machines, useful, handy, clever, innovative, invention, close to home
'I appreciate the fact that you're a computer whiz, Allan, but I'd prefer that you actually laugh out loud at my jokes.'
"If you're so enlightened, how come you can't lick that slice?"
Rhinoceros Is Most Intelligent Ungulate
'Cut down your own tree $40' or 'Blast out your own tree $50'
Tags:tree, trees, cut, cutting, cutter, cutters, cuts, lumberjack, lumberjacks, blow up, blowing up, blows up, explode, exploding, exploded, explodes, blast, blasted, sell, seller, sellers, selling, sold, clever, unique, customer service, customer services, sale, sales, the flying mccoys, flying mccoys
"In return for an increase in my allowance, I can offer you free unlimited in-home computer tech support."
"He has intelligence but none of it is actionable."
Tags:dating, date, dates, dating pool, small dating pool, snide comment, snide comments, drink, drinks, after work drink, after work drinks, intelligent, intelligence, smart, clever, actionable, insult, insults, insulting, spy, spies, military intelligence, actionable intelligence, information, informant, informants
Mensa Does Improv
Tags:theatre, theater, stage, stageshow, stage show, entertain, entertains, entertaining, entertainers, act, acting, actor, actors, actress, actresses, iq, intelligence quotient, quotient, smart, smarts, intelligence, intelligent, clever, improv, improv comedy, improvised, improvising, obscure, complex, complicated, brain, brainiac, nerd, nerds, geek, geeks, convoluted
'Yes, yes, I get the symbolism, Mr. Sanchez. You can wear many hats. Very clever.'
Though he was ecstatic at the time, years later Mark would discover that his dog simply had a speech impediment.
Tags:dog, dogs, owner, owns, own, owners, mark, bark, woof, dad, dads, name, names, ecstasy, ecstatic, happy, joy, overjoyed, joyful, pound, pounds, speak, speaking, speaks, speech, speeches, impediment, impediments, disability, disabilities, disabled, clever, intelligent, coincidence, the argyle sweater, argyle sweater
'You're overqualified, Sir. In other words, you've become too smart for your own good.'
Graduates leave with lightbulbs above their heads.
The Wise Man
'I don't have much formal education, but I've googled a lot of things.'
"Of course they're clever. They have to be clever. They haven't got any money."
'As I see it, Pinocchio was motivated by a need to prove himself, while both Hansel and Gretel were driven by an inborn rebelliousness.'
'Come on, Fowler, you don't have to be a rocket scientist to figure this out!'
Food, Water And Tips
'Don't be embarrassed to ask for help Dad.'