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'You've only got a few days left to use up your healthcare benefits for the year. I'm going to call to see if I can get you in for a colonoscopy.'
Tags:colonoscopy, colonoscopies, phone, phones, telephone, telephones, line, lines, cable, cables, wire, wires, health insurance, medical insurance, health cover, medical cover, appointment, appointments, doctor, doctors, benefit, benefits, husband, husbands, wife, wives, hospitals, real life adventures
"Tell them that hilarious story about your colonoscopy."
Tags:colonoscopy, colonoscopies, funny story, funny stories, dinner party, dinner parties, conversation, conversations, conversation starter, conversation starters, chat, chats, chatting, small talk, hilarious, colon, eat, eats, eating, put off, puts off, putting off, gross, gross story, gross stories, disgusting story, disgusting stories
'Well, you appear to be free of infection, but your colonoscopy video has gone viral.'
'Sir, the drive-thru colonoscopy center is next door - but good for you for having it done.'
"Want to see my virtual colonoscopy?"
Tags:surgery, surgeries, operation, operations, colonoscopy, colonoscopies, virtual colonoscopy, virtual colonoscopies, colleague, colleagues, medical procedure, medical procedures, offices, office job, office jobs, office work, office worker, office workers, desk job, desk jobs, bored, boredom, telescopic camera, telescopic cameras, modern tech, modern technology, modern technologies
'The Colonoscopy of Dorian Gray'
"I haven't had this much fun since my colonoscopy."
"Hey Frank, how was your colonoscopy?" "In and out."
"I put the video of my colonoscopy on YouTube."
"Not an audit. The IRS wants to give me a financial colonoscopy."
"The colonoscopy isn't your eternal punishment...the prep is."
Excess Baggage: You used to really look forward to those business trips. Now any more.
"We just got a new computer system, so don't be surprised if your colonoscopy shows up on YouTube."
'No, the results of your colonoscopy are not trending on Twitter at the moment.'
"When you're done laughing, I'll explain how I got rear-ended driving to my colonoscopy."
Tags:colonoscopy, colonoscopies, rear ended, rear-ended, car accident, car accidents, automobile accident, car collision, car collisions, traffic collision, traffic collisions, pun, puns, laugh, laughs, automobile accidents, automobile accident, collisions, laughing, irony, marriage, medical procedure, medical procedures
'While you may not be as comfortable with a female doctor, on the plus side, my hands are smaller.'
It's the thought that counts...'on our first anniversary he gave me a pearl necklce. On our silver anniversary he gave me a colonoscopy!'
'Must they play The Long and Winding Road right now?'
'If you don't want Google to make public your colonoscopy, check this box and your ass will be pixilated.'
'I wish we could tape their ramblings under anesthesia, it would make a great reality show.'
'Funnily enough, I always seem to get a spare seat beside me on the bus.'
Tags:colonoscopy, coloscopy, endoscopic examination, endoscopic examination, coloscopies, colonoscopies, public transport, public transports, public transportation, public transportations, bus, buses, bus travel, medical problem, medical problems, health problem, health problems, commute, commutes, commuter, commuters, commuting
"Okay, we were bluffing. I don't really have an old film of my Granddad's colonoscopy. We thought the prospect of having to watch it would finally make you leave, and let us go to bed!"
Tags:projector, projectors, home movie, home movies, home film, home films, colonoscopy, colonoscopies, etiquette, etiquettes, bad manners, manner, manners, dinner party, dinner parties, home cinema, home cinemas, socializing, socialise, socialize, socialising, social skill, social skills, coloscopy, coloscopies
Ask me about my colonoscopy: 'Uh Oh.'
'Ordinarily, that wouldn't bother me, except Doc did the same blindfold trick last week, when he did my colonoscopy.'