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"I wanted you to meet our colon specialist before we miniaturized him."
I hate it when my proctologist is a big sports fan.
Proctologists on Thanksgiving
"Try to relax..."
"Give a man an exam and he'll be healthy for a day; teach a man to examine himself and he'll be healthy for a lifetime."
Bigfoot's Proctologist: Dr. Bighand.
'When I boasted that I was operating a crack house, it was only a little proctologist humor!'
"Congratulations, Doc, you got a 'thumbs up' on Facebook!"
"Congratulations on earning your Proctology license... bottoms up!"
'When I boasted that I ran a crack house, it was just a little proctologist humor.'
'What you mean 'Do I know anything about clarinets'? I'm a proctologist, not a musician! Why do you ask?'
'Well, another tail, another happy ending.'
"Ah...I see your mistake. We're, Proctor and Proctor. You're looking for the proctologist, next door."
Proctologist: Rear Entrance
'You changed careers to become a political consultant? - What were you before?'
'Oh, that brush. The chimney sweep forgot and left it here.'
'Don't be alarmed - I'm a proctologist.'
"The doctor has your probe results ready, Mr. Stewart."