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"Unless one is a humorist, Haskins. One should avoid attempts at humor."
"Let me slip into something more humorous."
"Apparently, I'm fun, but I'm no fun in bed."
"We never talk anymore."
Tags:dummy, dummies, ventriloquist, ventriloquists, ventriloquism, talk, talks, talking, conversation, conversations, married couple, married couples, old married couple, old married couples, chat, chats, chatting, speak, speaks, speaking, comedian, comedians, vaudeville, throw your voice, throwing your voice
"The later the set, the less they get my jokes."
"I punched way, way too far up."
"They'll think twice before making fun of you again!"
Tags:snl, comedian, comedians, comedy show, comedy shows, donald trump, president trump, comedy sketch, comedy sketches, trump administration, us politics, american politics, guillotine, guillotines, execution, executions, dictator, dictators, tyranny, tyrant, tyrants, free speech, free press, independent press
Lincoln Does Crowd Work
Tags:abraham lincoln, lincoln, president lincoln, civil war, american civil war, civil war era, american history, history, stand up, stand up comedy, stand up comedian, stand up comedians, comedy, comedian, comedians, crowd, crowd work, crowdwork, political speeches, political rally, political rallies
Plato The Standup
Tags:plato, philosopher, philosophers, philosophy, standup, stand-up, stand up, standup comedy, standup comedian, standup comedians, comedian, comedians, tough crowd, tough crowds, bad audience, bad audience, bore, boring, boredom, unfunny, insult, insulting, insulted, insults, ancient greece, classical greece, greek philosopher, greek philosophers
Before they brought comedy to the microphone club
"The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil clowns is that good clowns do nothing."
Tags:costume, costumes, evil clown, evil clowns, party clown, party clowns, clown, clowns, comic performer, comic performers, slapstick, humour, humor, comedy, comedian, comedians, mime, mimes, edmund burke, triumph of evil, clown phobia, clown phobias, coulrophobia, coulrophobe, coulrophobic, coulrophobics, coulrophobes, fear of clowns
"Angelo tells us you haven't been laughing."
Tags:jester, jesters, court jester, court jesters, intimidate, intimidates, intimidating, comedian, comedians, audience, tough crowd, tough crowds, crowd, crowds, audiences, rough gig, rough gigs, laugh, laughs, laughter, laughing, king, kings, court jester, court jesters, mafia, mafioso, mob, mobs, organized crime, criminal, criminals, organised crime, comedy, offended, take offense, taking offense, take offence, taking offence
"Seriously, the way you rasied me it's no wonder I can't get a gig in a real night club."
Tags:parent, parents, parenting, parenthood, growing up, child rearing, kid, kids, child, stand up, stand-up, stand up comedy, stand-up comedy, comedian, comedians, comedy, show business, conservative, conservatives, conservative family, conservative families, conservative view, conservative views, blame, pass the blame, passing the blame, incompetent, incompetence, untalented
"She's come a long way, and I know you'll receive her act in the spirit in which it's intended. Yes, folks, it's Mimus Polyglottos, the Texas Mockingbird!"
Tags:mockingbird, mockingbirds, comedy, comedies, comic, comics, comedian, comedians, comedy act, comedy acts, standup, standups, standup act, standup acts, stand-up act, stand-up acts, bird, birds, standup comedian, standup comedians, stand-up comedian, stand-up comedians, stand-up comic, stand-up comics, migration, migrations, migrating pattern, migrating patterns, wildlife
"Last night my mom made us watch an old comedy with cary grant. He's funny, but he's no Adam Sandler."
"I'm sorry I ever said that was cute."
Tags:annoy, annoys, annoying, irritate, irritates, irritating, irritation, novelty song, novelty songs, comedy, comedian, comedians, habit, habits, bad habit, bad habits, embarrass, embarrasses, embarrassing, humiliate, humiliates, humiliating, introduction, introductions, introduce, introduces, couple, couples, husband, husbands, wife, wives, trigger, triggers, lose temper, losing temper, mislead, marriage problem, marriage problems
'I just think everyone in the family should have the same rights and privileges.'
"Stop me if you heard this one."
"Well, he didn't get that kind of language from me!"
Tags:language, bad language, ventriloquist, ventriloquists, ventriloquism, bad language, swear, swears, swearing, curse, curses, cursing, dummy, dummies, parent, parents, parenting, repeat, repeats, repeating, repetition, bad habit, bad habits, blame, blames, blameless, mother, mothers, father, fathers, spouse, spouses, comedian, comedians
Tags:comedian, comedians, comic, comics, comedy act, comedy acts, comedy show, comedy shows, radiation, comic radiation, big bang, breakup, breakups, break up, break ups, break-up, break-ups, girlfriends, boyfriend, boyfriends, breaking up, astronomer, astronomers, astrophysics, astrophysicist, astrophysicists, standup, standups, stand up, stand ups, stand-up, stand-ups
Will Rogers' Cat
Tags:king, kings, queen, queens, sovereign, sovereigns, ruler, rulers, monarch, monarchs, monarchy, royal, royalty, history, historical, medieval, jester, jesters, fool, fools, comedian, comedians, juggler, jugglers, juggling, death, dead, widow, widows, husband, husbands, dead husband, dead husbands, wife, wives, shocked, surprised, too soon, mourning, grieving, head, heads, executed, execution, executions, capital punishment, punishments, decapitated, decapitation, decapitations, rebellion, rebellions, revolution, revolutions
"Welcome to an evening of doo-wop! Just kidding, folks. Now for the Berlioz."
"Isn't Jim Carrey getting too old to make Jim Carrey movies?"
Tags:jim carrey, immature, immaturity, juvenile, humor, humour, sense of humor, sense of humour, sophomoric, slapstick, age, ages, ageing, aging, grow old, grows old, growing old, grow up, grows up, growing up, comedian, comedians, comedy, comedies, actor, actors, acting, movie star, movie stars, film star, film stars, washed-up