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"We can negotiate any type of contract but we specialize in 'me too' clauses."
"Oh dear did we neglect to read the contract thoroughly?"
"Of course it's quite common to sign contracts in BLOOD these days..."
GPC negotiators will only take on 'merited criticism'.
"I do. Have your people contact my people to hammer out the details."
"You can't leave holes in an agreement, I could run a coach and horses through this....So let's be crystal clear, if you don't clean your toothy pegs, there will be a 15% reduction in story time."
'Ok, here's the meeting agenda ... it's gonna be a long one.'
"This is what happens when you award the contract to the Cheapest Tender."
"My client wants a fifty-per-cent salary boost, a bonus guarantee, and a snappy choreographed victory dance he can do after he makes a touchdown."
"The Starview carwash is willing to pick up your seven million dollar contract, and they'll pay it our over 194 years."
'Your salary will remain high, but management gets a share of any baseball card royalties.'
"When you said I would be paid in stock, I didn't think you meant beef stock."
"I'm ready. Are you ready? Let the billing begin!"
'We've negotiated a contract in which my client agrees to always give it 104 percent.'
'Here lies one of THE GREAT contract negotiators...it says so in the fine print.'
"Do you handle employee salary negotiations as well?"
"Nice work on that German contract. You've made your mark, Ashworth."
"Five year non-exclusive? We just want to abduct him!"
"It was a misunderstanding. I thought I was buying all rights to her hand in matrimony, she thinks it was just first rights."