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Men's Intuition: 'Oh, I can tell from that look you're never going to let this go.'
'What do you mean, you can't cook either?'
"My husband said I should try a cookbook when I'm cooking! But I don't think it will taste any better!"
"Actually, this tastes exactly like home cooking to me...ma's one of the prison cooks here!"
"We bought the most expensive cut of meat....you marinated it for two days in your secret sauce....and all you end up with is that?"
"Can you come over here for a second and give this a pained look?"
'Yeah, Hon - is the microwave supposed to glow redhot?'
"It's a little bland, because I microwaved it."
"Other than that, how did you like it?"
"I hope you like your chicken extra-crispy."
"Wow, Daddy! You finished that so fast! I'll make you some more!"
"No, no, no....It's not your cooking. Just a hairball."
"This meal tastes just like dog crap!"
Tags:fly, flies, bug, bugs, home-made meal, homemade meal, homemade dinner, homemade dinners, home-made meals, home-made dinner, home-made dinners, home cooking, insect, insects, cooking skill, cooking skills, dinnertime, dinner time, dinner-time, extra crispy, gourmet meal, gourmet meals, gourmet cooking
'I'm not sure how you managed to burn a bowl of cereal.'
'I would make a nice compote.'
"Quick, get it while its molecules are still vibrating."
"When Stan's barbecuing nothings ever 'well done'."
Tags:barbecue, barbecues, bbq, bbqs, barbeque, barbeques, barbequing, barbecuing, grill, grills, cookout, cookouts, cook-out, cook-outs, grilling, summer, summers, summertime, summer-time, chef, chefs, cook, cooks, cooking skill, bbq king, bbq kings, cooking skills, burger, burgers, hotdog, hotdogs, hot dog, hot dogs
"I bought you a cook book. Think of it as technical support."
Tags:cookbook, cookbooks, cook book, cook books, recipe, recipes, technical support, technical supports, cook-book, cook-books, chef, chefs, cook, cooks, cooking skill, cooking skills, househusband, househusbands, house-husband, house-husbands, wife, wives, married couple, married couples, male stereotype, male stereotypes, gender role, gender roles
"Your coffee could be grounds for divorce."
"I was going to make dinner but we are all out of peanut butter and jelly."
"My Dad made my lunch. That would explain the peanut butter and baloney sandwich!"
Tags:sandwich, sandwiches, dad, dads, father, fathers, parent, parents, parenting, parenthood, lunchbox, lunchboxes, lunch box, lunch boxes, lunch-box, lunch-boxes, recipe, recipes, cook, cooks, cooking skill, cooking skills, kid, kids, family life, family-life, baloney, peanut butter, packed lunch, packed lunches
"It's not he worst meal I've ever eaten, that was your dinner yesterday."
Tags:cooking skill, cooking skills, cook, cooks, chef, chefs, dinner, dinners, meal, meals, kitchen, kitchens, insult, insults, insulting, insulted, wife, wives, husband, husbands, girlfriend, girlfriends, boyfriend, boyfriends, married life, married couple, married couples, gourmet, gourmets, gourmand, gourmands
"Dad's barbeucuing again so Mom's got the pizza place on speed dial."
Tags:speed dial, speed dials, barbecue, barbecues, barbeque, barbeques, barbecuing, barbequing, bbq, bbqs, cookout, cookouts, grill, grills, cook out, cook outs, cook-out, cook-outs, cooking skill, cooking skills, takeaway, takeaways, chef, chefs, cook, cooks, cooking, pizza, pizzas, family life, family-life
"The next time I ask you what you want for dinner don't say, 'surprise me'."
"And how exactly am I supposed to peel the carrots when we don't even have an electronic multiblade adjustable potato peeler?"