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"Meechum, clear out your desk and be out of this building in an hour."
Tags:yes man, yes men, fired, firing, firings, layoff, layoffs, laid off, laying off, subservient, subservience, boss, bosses, manager, managers, management, can do, comply, complies, complying, compliant, office drone, office drones, worker drone, worker drones, executive, executives, downsize, downsizes, downsizing, corporate downsizing, last day, last days, corporate ladder, corporate ladders, corporate hierarchy, corporate hierarchies
"It's called monotheism, but it looks like downsizing to me."
Tags:roman empire, christian, christians, christianity, god, gods, greek, roman, greek god, greek gods, myth, myths, mythology, mythological, monotheism, monotheist, monotheists, zeus, mercury, athena, downsize, downsizes, downsizing, job cut, job cuts, restructure, restructures, restructuring, corporate downsizing, layoff, layoffs, laid off, goddess, goddesses, pagan, pagans, paganism, spread of christianity, corporate culture
"We've cut out a lot of unnecessary middle management, or at least I think we have... There's no one left in HR to do a headcount!"
"Then, after you have spent those 30 years working your heart out on the company's production line, you will be laid off because of a corporate merger, only to discover you have lost all your retirement benefits."
Tags:production line, production lines, fire, fired, firing, firings, corporate merger, corporate mergers, realistic, realism, prediction, predictions, predicting, crystal ball, crystal balls, psychic, psychics, medium, mediums, clairvoyant, grim, bleak, future, futures, outcome, outcomes, corporate downsizing, job loss, job losses, layoff, layoffs, restructure, restructures, restructuring
"You think you got problems."
Tags:corporate buyout, corporate buyouts, beg, begs, begging, beggar, beggars, panhandle, panhandles, panhandling, panhandler, panhandlers, homeless, homeless person, homeless people, buyout, buyouts, bought out, laid off, layoff, layoffs, corporate layoffs, corporate downsizing, downsizing, downsize, downsizes, downsized, problem, problems, help sign, help signs, relative, relative problem, relative problems, relativism
"How cute! A smiley face on my pink slip."
Tags:smiley, smileys, smile, smiles, smiley face, smiley faces, pink slip, pink slips, fire, fired, fires, sack, sacks, sacking, sackings, firings, downsize, downsizes, downsizing, corporate downsizing, corporate culture, bad news, deliver, delivers, delivering, delivery, deliveries, notice, notices, notification, notifications, optimist, optimists, glass half full
"And then, at the height of their power, they seem to have succumbed to a mysterious people known as 'the bottom-line types.'"
Tags:bottom line, bottom lines, downsize, downsizes, downsizing, corporate downsizing, restructure, restructures, restructuring, collapse, civilization, civlizations, civilisation, civilisations, destruction, destroy, destroys, destroying, corporation, corporations, corporate logic, cold calculation, cold calculations, fall of empires, fall of the empire
"Where have all the retail sales jobs gone...gone to online sales every one..."
Tags:retail sales, brick and mortar, brick and mortar store, brick and mortar stores, online sales, ecommerce, e-commerce, unemployment, job loss, job losses, downsizing, corporate downsizing, downsize, retailer, retailers, customer service, customer service representative, customer service representatives
Tags:downsize, downsizes, downsizing, corporate downsizing, layoff, layoffs laying off, superfluous, superfluous worker, superfluous workers, efficiency, efficiency expert, efficiency experts, lean, leaner, repair, repairs, repairman, repairmen, staff reduction, staff reductions, job elimination, job eliminations, redundancy, redundancies, make redundant, made redundant
"Bad news, hon. I got replaced by an app."
Tags:app, apps, application, applications, fired, firing, firings, layoff, layoffs, downsize, downsizes, downsizing, corporate downsizing, restructure, restructures, restructuring, replacement, replacements, smart device, smart devices, smartphone, smartphones, smart phone, smart phones, tablet, tablets, computer tablet, computer tablets, jobs disappearing, creative destruction
Doing More With Less
"Bad news, everyone. Our origami paper branch folded."
Tags:origami, paper, papers, fold, folds, folding, downsize, downsizes, downsizing, folded, double meaning, double meanings, went under, branch, branches, corporate downsizing, efficiency expert, efficiency experts, paper mill, paper mills, expansion, expansions, division, divisions, presentation, presentations, business meeting, business meetings, bad news
"The boss said this meeting would be bloody."
"It's that new troubleshooter you hired, sir -- He got himself in the foot."
Tags:troubleshooter, troubleshooters, troubleshooting, third party, third parties, shoot yourself in the foot, footshooter, footshooters, foot shooter, foot shooters, self-harm, self-harms, self-harming, efficiency expert, efficiency experts, corporate downsize, corporate downsizing, corporate downsizer
"Let me guess...you had to fire some people today, right?"
"In appreciation of your outstanding work and loyalty I'll present you with this valuable moving box where you can put in your personal belongings. You're fired."
Tags:appreciation, employee appreciation, manager, managers, boss, bosses, big boss, big bosses, fire, fires, firing, fired, sack, sacked, sacking, sackings, downsize, downsizes, downsizing, corporate downsizing, cruel, cruelty, loyal, loyalty, recognition, recognize, recognizes, recognizing, recognise, recognises, recognising, personal belongings, box, boxes, gather, gathers
'Get into the machine, Arnie. You're being downsized also.'
"I'm doing the work of 3 people, but the boss just laid all 3 of us off!"
"We'll take a 10% cut in benefits if you'll take a 10% cut in stock options."
Tags:negotiate, negotiates, negotiation, negotiations, union, unions, trade unions, union worker, union workers, benefits, benefits cut, benefits cuts, stock option, stock options, manager, managers, like for like, cut, cuts, cutback, cutbacks, cutting costs, cut costs, cuts costs, downsize, downsizing, corporate downsizing, fair play, fair, wage, wages, fair wage, fair wages, income inequality, income gap, wealth gap
"You can have the job if you're willing to relocate to China and accept their wages."
Tags:relocate, relocates, relocating, outsource, outsources, outsourcing, china, chinese, wage, wages, wage cut, wage cuts, globalism, globalist, globalists, minimum wage, salary, salaries, salary cut, salary cuts, downsize, downsizes, downsizing, corporate downsizing, pay cut, pay cuts, cut, cuts, cutback, cutbacks, cutting back, cut back, cut backs
'Victim of corporate downsizing' (small man.)
"No...I've made my decision...I'm laying off Joey and Hernando. You, Beatriz and Kiyoshi will have have to pick up the slack. And by the way...you're my new assistant manager."
'I'm in favor of corporate downsizing, I can't wait to loose a couple of pounds.'
"Mr. Rod, we know what's happening...you're laying us all off."